June 7, 2014. Ridgeland, Ms. More Homes.

Today we saw the outside of more beautiful homes, this time on the Reservoir. We drove over the spillway to the other side of the reservoir from our condo and followed as close as we could to the lake. Every time we found a subdivision, we went in. One nice area of homes had a gate. I have learned to hate gated communities when we are exploring. Yesterday, we just waited until someone was opening the gate. Then we followed them in. Today we had no luck. But I had no problem knocking on the door if the home was for sale. If no one answered, I looked in the windows and if there was no furniture, we walked around to the back yard. We saw several lovely dock and water front areas. Of course, we have no idea what these homes are selling for but we assume that as we are in Mississippi, we could afford them. Our problem is that we might not want a lovely home on the water. But we have seen many beautiful homes. The only thing we know for sure is that we need more space to live in Mississippi. It might be a bigger condominium or a place with land in the country. We are exploring all our options so we will be ready when the farm sells. My optimistic heart is returning.

June 6, 2014. Ridgeland, Ms. Homes on the Lakes.

Just north of Jackson, in Madison County, are four private small lakes. Ken and I drove around three of them today, up and down every street, wandering around the houses that were for sale. We saw beautiful homes in exquisite surroundings, all within a 45 minute drive from downtown Jackson. These areas were developed 15 years ago so by now, the homes are being sold. It was sister in law Katie who suggested we check out the lakes, so we did. We really only looked at the waterfront homes, but we did like what we saw. Our problem is trying to figure out what we want. Do we want country property where we can walk for an hour on our own land, but where we are somewhat isolated? Do we want to live in a community with people on all sides? We will also investigate the homes on the reservoir. Ken likes to have projects but he is wondering whether or not he is up to working any projects. It is a puzzle, trying to figure out the future. Of course, we have no clue what funds we will have when the farm sells. At the moment, we are just exploring our options, and checking them out one by one. The most interesting part of the day was to see these beautiful homes overlooking the lakes. We never expected such homes and settings in Mississippi.

June 5, 2014. Ridgeland, MS. A Circle of Caring.

Tonight, a friend of Christina’s brought dinner. Folks have been doing it from the moment of Andrew’s death seven weeks ago. Tonight, I read again the cards from friends and relatives.. Along with the e mails, it has been obvious to me that there has been a circle of caring all around, with our family right in the middle. I often felt as if I was enveloped in a giant hug.. The sentiment of the circle of caring was in a card sent by my friend Elley and has helped me to keep in mind the number of people sharing in my sorrow. I received cards from people I worked with 25 years ago and Bob Snider donated funds in Andrew’s name to an education group, even though I stopped working with him 25 years ago. I have been impressed with the level of caring. Another card said , “You will never be alone in the sorry you bear”. This from Wendy and Bob. All these cards and e mails and dinners have been helpful as we begin to build our life without Andrew. And then there have been the prayers. Everyone we know keeps us on their prayer list, giving us yet another area of support. All together and bit by bit, we are returning to a state with a happy heart, at least part of the time. We are doing it with the help and support of friends and family near and far. And we are grateful.

June 4, 2014. Ridgeland, Mississippi. Jaco's Tacos.

Immediately upon arrival, the children sat down at the tables. They seemed to organize themselves by age. It was fascinating to watch. The drinks were set out for the children so they very soon helped themselves . But I noted that they returned to their same table. The adults stood and drank Margaritas and chatted. This evening, Ken and I invited our Jackson friends to dinner at Jaco’s Tacos. These friends are good friends of Andrew and Christina and have been gracious to us by inviting us into their homes. By now, I feel they are our friends too. Our condo is small so we must entertain in restaurant. The children always have the best time but the adults enjoy it too.. It was easy. We served fajitas with all the trimmings so the kids could help themselves at any time. For dessert we ate bananas foster. The flames impressed both children and adults. A good time was had by all, including Ken and me.

June 3, 2014. Ridgeland, Mississippi. Country Property.

"What were they thinking", I said to myself. The property is just north of Canton. The owner spent a fortune planting trees and bushes. The 111 acres is fenced. The driveways, which are long, are paved. He built a 40acre pond with a covered dock and a boat slip. There is a swimming pool and a covered barbecue area. The three acres surrounding the house are fenced. Trees and flowers are everywhere. And there is security. To enter the property you use a code to open the gate. A separate code opens the gate to the house area.. On the back of the property there is a large four bay shed with high doors fit for large boats. This place is fancy and seems more like a city than a country place. Then you get to the house. First we must find the key, which is under a piece of sculpture on the front porch. After all the gates and codes and the security, I laughed about the key. The husband must have designed the house after he spent all his money on the grounds. The house is small, and dark. And the furniture is too big. The wife must have purchased all the furniture without first looking at the space. The house has all the bells and whistles except for space. When the farm sells, we will buy a larger property in Mississippi. One option is to keep our condo and buy a place in the country, so we were looking at this property with Denman, the agent that Andrew had worked with earlier this year. We liked Denman, and this property could work for us, but we did wonder why the owners built such a small odd house. I feel sure that folks looking at our farm wonder why we own two large houses on the same farm. The answer I guess is that everyone makes mistakes.

June 2, 2014. Ridgeland, Mississippi. Passing Parade.

It is not normally my cup of tea, but this book called Passing Parade, is worth reading. The subtitle is Obituaries and Appreciations, which pretty much tells you the whole story. Mark Steyn is an excellent writer, but usually about politics or music. For quite a while he wrote obituaries for several magazines, such as the Atlantic. This book pulls together some of his best. They are amusing and informative. As most of the people lived and died during my lifetime, I am familiar with the people he writes about so I find myself comparing my mental notes about the people with his writings. Most of the time, he has more to say. I never read obituaries in the papers but these written by Mark Steyn are light and breezy and entertaining. Just yesterday I downloaded the book to my iPad, after I had read a short article about the Mommas and Poppas, in which the book was briefly discussed. Much to my surprise, I looked it up, found out it was not expensive and have been reading it ever since. It is my first sustained reading since Andrew died.

June 1, 2014. Ridgeland, Mississippi. Appointments.

It is really very odd. Ken and I visit each doctor together and sometimes we see the doctor together in the same examining room. For instance, on Thursday, we had an appointment with the Cardiologist. Ken had by-pass surgery several years ago, and I miss a heart beat every now and then, so we must both see the cardiologist once a year. But until now, we have not seen the doctor together in the same room. Evidently, in the world of geriatrics, having couples together is a good idea because the doctor gets information from both parties. More importantly, the instructions are given to both. At our meeting with Dr. C., he recommended to Ken that he walk at least 30 minutes every day. I am sure, had I not been in the same room, I would have never heard that admonition. Our system of bringing all our doctors to Mississippi seemed like a good idea. Jackson is the site of the Medical school and the city is not huge so we can get to the appointments easily. Our problem now is that we spend our time while in Jackson visiting doctor's offices. Neither of us enjoys seeing doctors but during the three weeks we will in Jackson, we both have four appointments, all together, but probably we will be in different examining rooms. At least I hope so. So far, all the doctors have been excellent and we are pleased with our medical care. Now perhaps we could see the doctors every other year and we would be happy.