December 31, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Breakfast.

Promptly between 8:30 and 10:00 I come down the stairs for breakfast. I wear wool socks and the stairs have carpet so I am quiet. But Irene hears me coming and greets me as I come into the room. Irene sits on the couch working the crossword puzzle from the Globe and Mail, drinking her second cup of coffee. Irene wakes up early. The first thing she does in the morning is to push the button to start the coffee. The evening before she grinds the coffee and sets up the coffee for the next day. Next she brings in the papers, the Toronto Globe and Mail and the Hamilton Spectator. Irene removes the crossword puzzle from the Globe and starts working it while she drinks her first cup of coffee. And she reads my little blog. Next she eats her breakfast and continues to work the puzzle. When I appear, on the kitchen counter is my breakfast plate. It is a delightful part of the day. Every day is different. This morning I ate a crumpet with peanut butter, with a cut up pear. All I need to do is toast the crumpet and add the butter. Yesterday on my plate was a muffin, cheddar cheese and a tangerine. Irene covers my plate. My role is to pour my coffee and carry my plate to the living room. And I eat my breakfast. In addition, on my end table is a box of dark chocolate truffles, given to me for Christmas by Irene. I eat one truffle each morning along with my breakfast. Sometimes I drink a second cup of coffee. Life is good. Eventually, Dave comes down for breakfast. He reads both papers, cover to cover. And he gets his own breakfast while Irene completes the puzzle. Our breakfast routine is pleasant, all because Irene has looked after all our needs. There is something special about coming into the kitchen to get coffee and discover a plate is awaiting me. Being spoiled has its own reward. It makes me feel special.

December 30, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. A Ladies Tea.

On Christmas Day, Alana gave me a hand written, beatifically decorated Christmas card. Inside the card was a lovely invitation to tea. The special tea was for the ladies of the family, to be held on Dec. 30, at Wendy's home. This tea party was Alanas gift to us. Diane picked Irene and me up. When I arrived at the tea, I was escorted immediately to the dining table. I was so entranced with the table that I stood admiring it for ages. It looked exactly like a high tea at the Empress Hotel in Victoria. The table was full of beautiful china and wonderful delicacies. Everything we could ever want at a high tea was on the table, including the three tier plates. We had clotted cream, strawberry preserves, little sandwiches, cheese and cracker tray, olives, apple butter, home made scones.and more. Wendy used all my Mothers china, which always pleases me. The table looked beautiful but we soon attacked the goodies, which were delicious, all made by Alana. At the table were the six ladies: Irene, Diane, Alana, Katey, Wendy and me. We had a grand time and was an unusual gift, which we all appreciated. At the same time, my brother Dave took the men out to lunch to a restaurant in Burlington overlooking Lake Ontario. Unfortunately, Ken was ill so Dave took Norm and Brock. The restaurant is a favorite of mine because Dave and Irene took Ken and me to the same restaurant several years ago. While you sit at lunch, the freighters move along the lake. Their timing was perfect. They arrived back to the tea house just in time for Irene and I to drive home with Dave and Diane to head home with Norm. The men enjoyed their lunch. But I bet they did not have as much joy as we had sitting around the lovely table, sipping tea from fancy cups and nibbling all the goodies prepared for us by Alana. It was a meal set for Queens and a most welcome gift.

December 29, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Candles.

The first thing I spotted when I looked at the dining table was 7 big fat candles sitting right on the table cloth. They looked lovely but I was surprised that Irene had placed the candles directly on the table cloth. Then I forgot about them. Later in the evening, when the candles were lit throughout dinner, I admired them out loud but said nothing about the candles sitting right on the table cloth. After dinner, while Irene and I were sitting at the table chatting, Irene picked up one candle and turned it upside down. I gasped. I felt sure the hot wax would spill. But no. All she did was flip off the little switch to turn off the candles. I tell you. These candles look real. All seven of these big fat candles come on with the switch. And they flicker too. Everyone else knows about those candles but not me. They all look real some with wax cut down the side, just as if the candle had been lit. They look great. Irene also has one in the powder room to use as a night light. It flickers away but never gets hot. Amazing. I noticed at the concert at Mississippi College that the choir members came in the procession carrying lit candles. But they were not real. They were lights pretending to be candles which for safety purposes makes perfect sense. When the choir left at the end of the concert, they were again carrying the candles/lights. But at the First Pres. concert the choir came in carrying real candles which they blew out after the first piece. And we didn't see them at the end. The candles on the Christmas dining table at Dave and Irene's home look spectacular. They certainly fooled me. But no more. I turn out the candles directly after dinner. And I do not drop any wax on the tablecloth which is another blessing in my life. I learn something every day.

December 28, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Joyce and Bill.

They drove all the way from Stoufille, just to have lunch with me. And I appreciated the effort because I enjoyed their company. They live east and a bit north of Toronto so it is quite a long drive but the day was glorious with no rain and with full sun, perfect weather for driving. The GPS brought them right into the complex but they forgot to bring the unit number, which was 10 so being resourceful, they knocked on a few doors until finally someone was home and directed them to Dave and Irene. They chatted with Dave and Irene for a few minutes, then we were off to my now favorite restaurant, Cavello Nero. Our lunch was everything I had hoped it would be. The service was good. And the waiter left us lots of time to talk in between courses. As it was yesterday, the food was excellent. And we talked. Usually, Joyce and Bill spend the winters in Florida. But two years ago the enjoyed two months in Portugal, which they enjoyed. This year they will stay at home and organize their belongings because they have purchased a condo which is now under construction. They are organizing and shedding belongings, something we have all done. The problem for them is to decided when to put their home up for sale. I had no advice because I do not know anything about the real estate market in Ontario. They do not wish to sell their present home before the condo is complete. Smart people. In addition, my friend Florence, who is the sister of Joyce, has purchased a condo in the next building to them., which pleased me. My system of inviting my friends has worked. I thoroughly enjoyed my lunch with Bill and Joyce. I have been their friends since I was 15, which is a long time and certainly worth celebrating. I am grateful that they drove all the way for lunch with men. Hats off to them.

December 27, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Lunch.

My lunch was unexpected and delightful. Before I left Mississippi I had invited friends from Toronto to meet me for lunch in Ancaster. Much to my surprise, they agreed. At first I was thinking of a luncheon for all of us together but decided to have them come one at a time, thus giving me the time to talk to each couple. Today Tom and Joyce were to come for lunch. The plan was for them to come to Dave and Irene's home to say hello. Then I would drive with them to the restaurant, which is just down the street. But yesterday the motor on their windshield wiper stopped working and as Boxing Day is a holiday, no mechanic was on duty. They were forced to cancel. I was disappointed. But not for long. I did not cancel the reservation. I invited Dave and Irene for lunch. And I invited Diane and Norm too. Diane was working but Norm accepted the invitation. The four of us enjoyed a delightful lunch together. I learned that spending time with just one person means that the conversation is interesting. And being with Norm with just Dave and Irene was unusual and a pleasure. Both Irene and Wendy recommended the restaurant in Ancaster, which turned out to be excellent, which pleased me because all my friends will be having lunch with me there too. I ate a small pizza, about 6 inches in diameter, full of vegetables. Along with a big Caesars salad my lunch was complete. Cavello Nero was a good choice, fortunately. My lunch today with Norm, Dave and Irene was an unexpected delight.

December 26, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Boxing Day.

My sister Carol always rented a skating rink on Boxing Day morning. She invited friends and relatives. Mostly Ken and I and the boys were in town. Our pattern was to drive up from Maryland and spend Christmas and Boxing Day with Dave and Irene, then drive north to see ken's Mother in Parry Sound. David and Andrew learned to skate at those sessions. Many relatives helped the boys get around the rink. Everyone in Canada can skate so at those sessions, people zoom around the rink. Ken and I would laugh when we rented Wheaton skating for my birthday celebration. Friends did not skate nearly as fast as those folks did on Boxing Day parties in Hamilton. Today on Boxing Day here we are all chilling out. Dave is still in his bath robe while I did not get up until 10. Irene has talked to Norm and Diane and they too are recovering from their big day of entertaining yesterday. 20 stopped by their home to say Marry Christmas and 22 people sat down for dinner at 6:30. The custom of Boxing Day comes from England and is celebrated in Britain, Australia and New Zealand. Apparently, the elite of the society boxed up the old toys and gave them to the poor in the community. I have no idea is this was true but in Canada the day after Christmas is called Boxing Day and is also a holiday. Many Canadians celebrate Christmas Day with immediate family and reserve Boxing Day for friends and extended family. Thus Carol's custom of rented the rink for friends and family. I miss those events and I miss the people who were there. But life goes on. Today, Irene, Dave and I had a lovely quiet day, Boxing Day, 2019 at their lovely home in Ancaster. Pretty nice.

December 25, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Christmas Day.

From the first moment of the day, my Christmas Day has been wonderful. Dave, Irene and I drank coffee while we opened our stockings from Santa. I had asked for no gifts but everyone paid no attention so I was opening gifts all day, which I thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated. The three of us ate Christmas muffins and fruit, while we opened gifts. Then in the door came Ken and Wendy, Katey and Brock and Alana with yet more gifts. And more talking. I had not seen Alana, Katey and Brock since the wedding in September, 2018 so I had lots to catch up on and I am taking full advantage. Dave and Irene went to Norm and Diane's home around 3:00 while I asked Wendy to pick me up later. Then I did some laundry and Wendy and I made my bed. Our plan was to have our Christmas feast with Diane and Norm. All the Buckley relatives were there along with neighbors and other relatives. We were a happy group of 22. Turkey with all the trimmings was what we ate and it was delicious, all made by Norm and Diane. They must be weary now. Lots of young people certainly make for a lively event. It was a lovely event. I have celebrated many Christmas seasons with Dave and Irene and you can not be reminded of past years with all the loved ones who are missed today. But we kept the spirit happy and were only focused on how grateful we were for all the Christmas seasons we have celebrated together. My day was busy and happy this Christmas Day 2019.

December 24, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Marion and Gary.

At Peter's party, Marion had an idea. She asked me if I would like to visit Eleanor E. at her retirement residence. I have known Eleanor most of my life but have never spent much time with her because she has always lived in Hamilton. I of course was delighted so yesterday Marion and Gary picked me up. Marion is the daughter of my sisters husband and as such I have always treated her as a niece. Marion and Gary have visited us in Texas, Nova Scotia and Maryland and we have kept close contact over the years. They are both energetic, kindly folks. Marion worked as an inhalation therapist so perhaps we had interests in common. I am always pleased to see them both. Eleanor is related to Marion and Marion and Gary have helped Eleanor over the years. Eleanor started reading my blogs years ago so she was keen to see me in real life. Eleanor's husband died suddenly at age 64. She was 62. Now she is 92. Yesterday I asked her how she managed when Bob died. She said that she immediately thought of how grateful she was that they had lived together so long and that her house had no mortgage. In addition, she taught piano so had something to do to fill her days. She played at church and continued to accompany musicians. She played the piano at my sister's funeral. Now she lives in a retirement home and makes a big contribution to the organization. She looks great and I enjoyed chatting with her. She has lived a successful, productive life. I was especially pleased to spend time with Marion and Gary. Marion had brought mince tarts, which I enjoyed over coffee with Eleanor. I had not eaten a mince tart for over 30 years. It reminded me of my past which pleased me. The visit to Eleanor was an unexpected pleasure as was spending time with Marion and Gary. Some days you just get lucky.

December 23, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. The Buckley Birthdays.

I have never celebrated the Birthdays before now. Celebrating all together started after we moved to Texas. But I was here this time and it was great fun. Dave and Irene have three children. Four of the five family members were born in December within 5 days of each other. Dave was born Dec.18. Irene the 19th, Wendy the 20th and Kenny the 22nd, so after the children grew up, they started celebrating the birthdays all together. This year the date was Dec.22. Diane's son Jonathan was born on Dec.12 and I on the 6th, so we were included this year in the December birthdays. The event was a birthday party with all it's glory, including birthday cake and presents. It was a wonderfully festive evening. Dave and Irene hold the event at their house. People arrive around 4:30. Of the 7 grandchildren of Dave and Irene, 4 attended along with their spouse or boyfriend. All three children and their spouses were there too along with Jonathon and his wife Brittany and their 2 children. Having young children at a birthday party lend an extra excitement to the air because they are so pleased to be at a fancy party. People chatted and nibbled both on the main floor and on the lower level. We sat 17 family members for dinner. We ate ham, scalloped potatoes and three salads with of course birthday cake and ice cream for dessert. And we sang Happy Birthday. Next came the presents, beginning with me on the 6th. One by one, each person opened their gifts and read out the cards, just like a regular party. It was fun and funny. One by one, the younger ones drifted out but the Buckley family sat chatting in the living room until Dave decided he was going to fall asleep. Irene organized the whole event so today she was weary. But it was a lovely event and again I enjoyed every minute of the evening. Congratulations to Dave and Irene for holding this wonderful event and especially hats off to Irene who organized every last detail to be sure the evening went smoothly. These Buckley Birthday celebrations are worth the trip.

December 22, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Open House.

The tradition is lovely. Dave and Irene have held an open house for the Buckley and Barby family the Sunday before Christmas. They have done it for over 40 years. My sister married a Baby so everyone from that family came along with all the Buckleys. Everyone would stop in to have a glass of wine and eat some goodies...and visit. The whole thing was pleasant. When Dave turned 80, my sisters son Peter and his wife Cindy offered to take over. Dave and Irene says YES. This afternoon, from 1 to 4, Peter and Cindy invited us all to the annual Christmas open house at their home in Burlington. I went with Dave and Irene, arriving just after 1:15. I was escorted into the family room and sat in a comfortable chair, where I stayed until we left for home at 2:30. Cindy brought me a glass of water. Wendy brought me a plate of goodies. And people came to sit beside me to talk. It was wonderful to chat with these good folks who I do not get to see any more. I talked with Marion and Gary for ages. I talked with Jennifer who I have not seen for 20 years. I had never met her husband Doug and they have been married 20 years. They both are RCMP officials. Jennifer is Marions daughter. I talked with Ben for ages. He is my sister Carol's son so I needed to catch up with his three children. And Peter, again a son of my sister, sat and talked with me for ages. Cindy checked up with me regularly to be sure I was OK, so I was well looked after. The dining room was full of young people but I stayed out of the crowds. I was happy to sit and talk. In addition, Cindy and Peter invite neighbors. The tradition has continued and I enjoyed every minute.

December 21, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. Reassurances.

Spending time with the younger generations gives me great reassurances for the future, especially when you spend time with Dave and Irene's children and grandchildren. So much of what is read tells of the disasters of the younger generation but the reality is something totally different, at least for me. Yesterday afternoon Wendy and I visited Alana, the younger daughter of Wendy. I wanted to see her new home which she purchased six months ago. Alana is a nurse. She has a BA in health policy. Then she took two years to get her RN. Now she works at St. Joseph's Hospital and she loves it. She saved every penny and now she is the proud owner of a charming white frame house with a front porch and two bedrooms. And she has a fenced yard for her dog Forest. Clearly, she has been making her own decisions and doing a good job with her life. I loved her little home, which is perfect for her. For the past two evenings I have had dinner with the three Buckley children and their souses. They are an impressive lot and I love them all. Ken and Anne arrived from Vancouver Thursday late afternoon so we ate dinner at Wendy and Ken. Norm and Diane were there too along with Alana. Friday evening we all ate together at Dave and Irene's home. We ate good food and had lively conversation, a combination that can never be beaten. This afternoon Ariel and her boyfriend came to visit Dave and Irene. Ariel is the middle child of Norm, who is the eldest child of Dave and Irene. Ariel and Rob live in Montreal and are here for the Chistmas season. Norm joined us. Then Norm and Rob and Ariel set up the table and arranged chairs for Irene in preparation for the family birthday celebration tomorrow. Shortly after they left, Kenny and Anne came to visit along with Ken and Wendy. We sat in the living room chatting, then worked a huge crossword puzzle together which was fun and productive. We sill have have the huge puzzle for tomorrow. All these folks are energetic, responsible and competent. It was a pleasure for me to spend so much time with them.

December 20, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. My Bed.

Irene was concerned. The guest room is on the front of the house directly over the garage. The ceiling of the garage is insulated but the garage door is not, so the garage gets cool which seeps up into the guest room, which is my room. In order to be sure I would be warm, she bought new flannel sheets. They are llamas wearing a Santa clause hat. Next she put on their warmest duvet. And finally she set out the wool Hudson's Bay blanket for me to use. So far I have slept in the guest room twice. I can report success. I slept well both nights. I was warm and cosy. I did put the wool blanket on top of the duvet. The first evening I wondered if I should just put the blanket on the chair and add it to the bed if I got cool. But I decided not to leave anything to chance so I added it to the bed clothes. The weather has been cold. The temperature was 14 degrees F. That is cold. Fortunately I have good warm clothes but I always seem to have cold legs. But when I get into my warm and cosy bed, my legs get warm. And I am grateful for all Irene's efforts.

December 19, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario. My Perfect Day.

My day began with large fluffy snow. David opened the curtains to find snow. it was beautiful, especially as we knew we could stay home. It snowed all morning but by noon the sky was clear so we were happy to be able to see the snow on the trees and fences but not be forced to deal with it when we went to Wendy's for dinner. One by one Dave and Irene and I ate breakfast sitting in comfortable chairs in the living room. And we listened to Christmas music while we talked. Dave read while Irene worked the crossword in the paper and I looked at e mails. Irene prepared lunch arounds 2:00, followed by more talking. We talked all afternoon. My deadline was 5:00 to get out of the chair, shower and get ready for dinner at 6:00. This day was a day of recovery after my journey. It was perfect. We talked all afternoon. We were all three perfectly content and happy. When we arrived for dinner, Ken and Anne greeted us at the door. They had just arrived from Vancouver, but they looked great. We had lots to talk about. I had not seen them since January 2018 when Ken was so ill in Mexico. They were both a huge help to both Ken and me so I needed to catch up on their actions. Since then they sold their house and bought a condo, all in Vancouver. At the end of the year they will retire and in March they will be ready to head out on their boat. Soon Norm and Diane arrived for dinner too. We ate a tourtierre, a delicious French Canadian dish. With broccoli and corn we ate a meal fit for the king. Ginger cookies, shortbread and brownies made for a delicious dessert. Alana, Wendy's daughter, came late straight from work. Our evening was a delight. In truth, my whole day was perfect. I had a wonderful time the whole day.

December 18, 2019. Ancaster, Ontario, Canada. Winter.

Driving in the limo was a reminder of winter. There were no leaves on any trees, just branches everywhere. The fieldss were covered with snow, and the ponds and lakes were frozen. I had actually forgotten the bleakness of the winter scene. But there is beauty in the landscape too. The driver kept asking if I was warm enough. He was wearing a jacket while I had no coat at all. I was actually cold but I did not admit how chilly I was. He was over heating. The day went perfectly in order. Kashina took me to the airport for my 7:00 flight. The flight to Atlanta left on time. I was efficiently taken to my next gate. And the flight left on time. I was at Dave and Irene's home by 5. Now the festivities will begin. Wendy will have dinner here with us. Tomorrow afternoon Kenny and Anne arrive from Vancouver and Saturday Katy and Brock arrive from Purdue. The clan is gathering. Winter is beautiful, especially when you look outside from the warm comfortable home. But it is cold. I have been outfitted with a warm coat for tomorrow. And Fridayday I retrieve my own beaver coat. I will be comfortable here. And I am delighted to be here with the Buckley family. I will enjoy the festive season. And mostly I will stay indoors. Winter has arrived to Ontario. I had forgotten the look.

December 17, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Gifts.

Some people seem to think of the perfect gift for a friend or relative. And some people are not. Trying to think of a gift for me is difficult. I do not eat sugar. Clothes are out because I am so big that nothing fits me. Ken always ordered everything we could possibly need or use for our homes so we need nothing. And we usually fly in and out so carrying an object is impossible. But sometimes, just the best gift arrives. When I was leaving brunch, Christina gave me a Christmas bag. She usually bakes for us but as I was leaving on Wednesday baking made no sense so I was surprised to be giving a gift. In the bag was a Christmas ornament: a brown pig with a gold crown. I love pigs and have several so this addition to my collection is perfect. It sits beside Grandma Houghton's gold framed picture on top of the book case. I love my pig. Molly selected the pig. On the same day, on Sunday I received a gift from my across the street neighbor. It comes in the category of, "What were they thinking?" These neighbors I like but over the years they have given me odd gifts. This gift was long and narrow, 42 inches by six inches by 4 inches high. It was nicely wrapped and brought to me by their charming daughter. The box was full of fancy cookies. I live by myself and I do not entertain much so my first thought was to wonder when I will eat all those fancy cookies. My answer was to say, "I will not ever eat them." So when Eleanor came to bring me home I gave her the box of cookies. With four children in their home those cookies will disappear in a flash, so immediately I regifted the gift. Now I hope they do not read my wee web log. I would not want them to be offended. One gift given to us years ago always makes me smile. We had an event in Ontario although we live in Maryland. We had flown and on the invitation had requested no gifts for this anniversary brunch. But someone ignored the request. When we opened the gift in Wendy's cottage later that day, , everyone in the room laughed, The gift was very heavy, made of some Crystal material. It must have weighed 15 pounds. There was no way to get it on the plane so we left the chunk of rock with Wendy where it still holds open the door. "What were they thinking?" I said to myself. My answer was that they probably regifted the gift to us. Gifts can be tricky but always fun.

December 16, 2019. Madison,. Mississippi. The Storm.

Yesterday there was a forecast for storm this afternoon, starting at 3:00. Both the TV and my phone gave me the same information. I made it a point to go walking in the morning, so at 11:30 I headed out wearing a T shirt and sneakers. The temperature was 74. I walked to the mail box to leave mail for the postman and discovered that the wind was blowing hard. Leaves were flying off the trees. I have been told not to walk outside with a strong wind. Our subdivision has many trees and sometimes a limb or a tree comes down so I did as I was taught and I turned around and went back into the house. Within five minutes, the rain started which kept up all afternoon and evening. Soon I heard thunder. Late in the afternoon a tornado watch was listed east of Jackson. We did have heavy rain and thunder and lightning early this evening but we never did lose power which pleased me. I wanted to listen to the Salt Lake City Tabernacle Choir concert. The storm moved north and east so skirted us in Madison. Tomorrow will be cold. 45 degrees. And Wednesday will be clear and cold. Everyone pays attention to storm forecasts here, even me. People stay indoors during periods of heavy rain and wind. Fortunately the storms do not last. It is still raining but we have no thunder or even heavy winds. Once again, we dodged a big storm.

December 15, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Christmas Music.

Everywhere you turn, you can hear music. It is the best time of the year. This evening at 6:00 I attended the Christmas Festival of Music at the First Presbyterian church in Jackson. Friend Eleanor picked me up and Jim and the girls arrived early to get us good seats. Christina and the girls attend that church as do the Sutherlands. The church choir is large. For the event, there was an orchestra of about half the size of s symphony orchestra. Most of the players are in the Mississippi Symphony so they were good. And we had a bagpiper too. The Minister of the church is a Scot and always wears a kilt for the Christmas concert. Between the kilt and the bagpiper the event had a Scottish flavor. The concert was first class all the way. The choir sang 10 pieces, the congregation sang three carols, the orchestra accompanied everything and the bagpiper played once. The only talking was the scriptures read in-between vocal pieces. The minister spoke for three minutes. There was music all evening. Almost heaven. The choir was excellent. They even sang some A Capallo anthems mid way of the piece. All of a sudden I could hear the ladies all by themselves with no organ and no orchestra. Then the orchestra joined in with the choir perfectly in tune. Amazing. Last evening the Sutherlands attended a concert of The Messiah, sung by a professional choir and full orchestra. It was held in a local large church, which was packed. They arrived early but were forced to sit on folding chairs at the end of the pews. Standing room only. Linda Creath attends a different church and tonight was their music program too. All three choirs sing along with soloists. Music is everywhere. Pretty nice.

December 14, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Il Volo.

There are so many talented people in the world just keeping up with them is difficult. These three young men have been singing together for ten years, when they were all teenagers. PBS did a special 10 year anniversary program. The three men are Italian and the concert was held in a city in Italy. All the speaking was in English but many songs were in Italian. These young men are good. PBS was having a fund raiser but in-between their talking I got to hear wonderful singing. I enjoyed their concert and will watch for them in the future. This evening, I watched a concert from Hawaii of Engelbert Humperdink. He is not young but he could still sing and sing well. His granddaughter sang a song with him that was sweet. I had not heard him sing for years but there he was, looking old but still singing. PBS does a good job of putting these programs together. I enjoyed listening to all the old songs. I don't think he is still recording. He sang all the old songs that he made popular. The audience sang along with him with every song. It was fun watching the audience. A couple of times he stopped singing but the audience just kept singing. He just laughed. I am enjoying all these Christmas special Both Monday and Tuesday will be special Christmas concerts on PBS. I will keep track of times and dates so not to miss them. I am still waiting to hear The Texas Tenors. But I especially enjoyed Il Volo, three young men with oodles of talent.

December 13, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Friends.

my friends indulge me. My friend Sara Lou reads my blog regularly so she feels as if we have had a good conversation but she knows it is a one way conversation. She knows about me but I know nothing about her. So every so often, when she is not too busy, we talk on the phone, just as we would do if we were sitting drinking a second cup of coffee. We talk for ages. And I like it. This week I heard about her month long trip in Africa, which was marvelous. And I caught up on her grandchildren. I enjoy these conversations. By now she makes sure to call me when she has time on her hands. I appreciate her indulgence. All the time I have been on chemotherapy my friends Wendy e mailed me every day, sometimes twice a day. She sent me healing hugs which I appreciated. My Mississippi friends indulge me by coming for coffee or lunch. They enjoy our conversations too as I have a different history and perspective than they, who have lived in Mississippi all their lives. I have to work harder in Mississippi to avoid being lonely as my circle of friends is small but the friends I have are especially helpful by indulging me. This Sunday evening friend Eleanor will pick me up so I can attend the Christmas Concert at their church. Last year she took me just a few days after Ken died. The choir and the singing allowed my spirits rise and set me on the proper path. I am grateful for my friends and hope they continue to indulge me.

December 12, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Lunch With Kashina.

Kashina is the opposite of Ken. She wants to eat food that she has eaten before and to go down roads that she knows. Her choices of food are narrow but I know she likes steak and has several times commented that she likes The Longhorn Steakhouse the best. Today, to celebrate Christmas I took her to her favorite steak house. Today is our last chance because she works on Sunday when we will go out with the family. I leave next Wednesday so today was our last opportunity to celebrate Christmas together. My selections for lunch are often unusual, at least from her standpoint so often she struggles to find food she will eat. On any menu, we always knew that Ken woulds order the weirdest food. With Kashina it is the opposite. I say nothing but I laugh to myself. Today Kashina ordered a T bone steak, served well done, with string potatoes on the side. I ordered salmon and a sweet potato, which were both excellent. She and I laughed about the steak after she ordered. "The steak will not be done well enough," she said. Sure enough, she sent the steak back three times because it was not cooked enough. Finally she ate the whole steak. Our meal was festive and we enjoyed our lunch at The Longhorn. Eating out with Kashina is an experience for me and I am enjoying watch her navigate around the menu. She of course thinks I eat weird food. Coming home from the restaurant she took a wrong turn and was nervous because she was driving on a road she did not know. But she laughed and said to me that I always want to go on new roads so now we were doing it. I liked the new road but Kashina was only comfortable when she was on a familiar road. To each his own. We did get home in a timely fashion and both of us agreed that our lunch was splendid.

December 11, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Living Alone.

Ken died one year ago today. Since then I have been living alone. In the early years of our marriage we made an agreement to not be apart unless absolutely necessary, which is what we did. Ken and I had the good fortune to love each other and we were able to get along. We enjoyed each others company. Ken had hundreds of ideas of things he wanted to do. And he looked up information for us. When I was forced to live without Ken, I knew the ideas and the research would end. My friend Doreen commented to me that my life would be easier since Ken died. She was right. My life is easier but not nearly as interesting. As I look back at my year without Ken I realize that, for the past two years, I had spent many hours by myself, so I was in training to live alone. The last year of Ken's life was difficult for Ken. He coped by listening to audio books. And he used the ear buds when watching TV so many times conversations with Ken were impossible. In addition, I had always had a life away from Ken and the family so I was used to being in charge of at least part of my days. Those two things have stood me in good stead when he died. My friend Butch told me that living along is not all bad and that there were advantages. I think of the TV clicker. My friend Alice Anne told me that nothing would happen to me unless I made it happen. I took all the bits and pieces of advice and tried to make a life then gave me pleasure. And I think Ken would be pleased with me too. So after one year I am still walking and talking and not complaining. I am managing quite well.

December 10, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Expectations.

Many of my friends get excited about a future event. I do not. My emotions are kept in check when thinking of a trip or an event in the future. I am pleased to be preparing for an event but I am not excited. I have been like that since I was 16 and received an awakening that until something happens, it might not ever happen. My friend was staying with our family while her parents were opening up the Jacksons Point Salvation Army camp for the summer. Major Halsey asked Fairie and I to come for the weekend to help. We were to be paid. I took my books to study because I knew that in two weeks I would be taking final exams. I have no recollection of how we got there but I learned at dinner that several young folks had arrived who would be working for the summer. At the same table was a young man from the Salvation Army Corps in Sarnia, Ontario. We hit it off. He was fun and funny and energetic and when we were not working, we spent all our time together. We swam and walked and talked. He played the piano so in the dining room after dinner, all the young folks would gather around the piano and sing. It was great fun being with him although there was nothing romantic about it. Needless to say, I did not crack a book. Fairie and I went back to school. I was looking forward to spending the weekend with that same young man as we had such a good time. So I left all my books home. At dinner Friday night, I discovered that the young man, whose name I can not recall had a new best friend, except now they were a romantic couple. He spent all his time draped over that other girl. I just laughed and learned my lesson, to never assume good times will be wonderful. I keep my expectations for future pleasures in check, and although I am pleased to think of future events, I never get excited. I learned that valuable lesson when I was 16. And it has kept me in check.

December 9, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Dinner at the Neighbor.

Just as we were driving away from the theatre yesterday my phone rang. My neighbor was asking me to come for a bowl of soup for dinner tonight. I was delighted because I like my neighbor Sandy but I do not see much of her. But she and her husband Archie are good friends. They spend 6 months in North Carolina every year so we only overlap a little bit in the Spring and Fall. Just when they were ready to leave to drive home, Archie fell and was unable to drive so Sandy drove all the way home. Since arriving home, Sandy has taken Archie to many doctor appointments. Every day there have been appointments while they try to find out what happened to him. He was lucky. No broken bones and no hit to the head but he was just inches away from falling down a set of 15 steps. They both came to the party on Friday evening with Archie using a walker and looking frail. My neighbors have a lovely home and I always enjoy visiting them. Archie had an upset stomach so just Sandy and I dined together, sitting in the breakfast room overlooking the reservoir. Except it was dark. What Sandy wanted to tell me was that they have decided to move to a smaller place, probably a condo. And she wanted to know how to proceed. We talked about how to select an agent and the questions to ask. But first she must begin looking at condos. Of course she has no idea of where she would like to live. Nothing will happen until the new year, which is not far away. To make things worse, today when she was at the optician she was told that she had the beginning of both glaucoma and macular degeneration, so she must deal with those issues too. I enjoyed dinner with Sandy. The home made soup and cornbread were delicious as was the Klondike bar for dessert. Unexpected invitations are a delightful surprise.

December 8, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. A Christmas Carol.

The New Stage Theatre has produced The Christmas Carol for 25 years. This afternoon Kashina and I attended. I enjoyed the production although many parts of the play was new to me, even though I have seen it numerous times. It was adapted my Michael Wilson and I suspect that Charles Dickens would be hard pressed to recognize it. For instance, Christmas carols were sung throughout the whole production. And there was dancing. The whole thing was charming and enjoyable. The basic story is the same, but embellished. The show took 2 full hours. When you watch it on TV it takes an hour so all kinds of things were added. Everything works out the same way and Merry Christmas was shouted from the roof tops. The New Stage Theatre is a professional group in Jackson. Their actors are a talented bunch and I applaud them for their efforts. This is only the second play I have seen at the theatre but I intend to return. I can only attend in the afternoon. Even then, Kashina prefers to leave at 3 on Sundays so even that makes life difficult. Today we left before any applause. Even then we got home at 4:30 which makes it a close call for her next appointment. I am not sure if she enjoyed the performance. She had not seen the play before and sometimes it was difficult to figure out what was happening. But I enjoyed it and I appreciated the new look on an old play. Watching a ghost story of Christmas is always a treat.

December 7, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. My Dishes.

Using my good dishes for every day brings me great pleasure. Often, it is the little things in life that keep one smiling. Every time I use my good dishes I smile. When we first married, a friend gave us a set of dishes with a dogwood blossom in the middle. I enjoyed using those dishes because they reminded me of beautiful Vancouver. Those dishes came from Eaton's store. Also as a wedding gift from a family friend Phyllis, was a set of Royal Doulton earthen ware with a bamboo pattern. Although they were not fine china, we used those dishes for our best, which they were. One Christmas, after we had been married for about 15 years, Ken gave me a place setting of fine china for Christmas. He had decided that we could afford good china so he went to the china department and selected the pattern. He never said a word to me or asked what I would like. He knew I would say that we could not afford good china. We were still using the two sets from our wedding. Ken enjoyed lovely things with high quality so he decided it was time to get us beautiful china, which he did. I loved the idea and I even liked the pattern. Bit by bit, we acquired more. Piece by piece our china grew. I now have 30 dinner plates. At some point I acquired the dishes from Miss. Tomlinson, which I began to use for every day. The dogwood dishes got lost in the shuffle. And I packed away the bamboo pattern, until we built the Top House at the ranch which we used every day, which I loved. Now the Spode dishes from Miss. Tomlinson are being used at the lake house in Texas. The bamboo dishes are boxed up and are in Texas. Ken's beautiful dishes are used by me every day. It pleases me to use those dishes at every meal and again, be reminded of the impact of Ken on my life. And I am grateful.

December 6, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. A Birthday Party.

This year I had my birthday party at Drago's restaurant in Jackson. Ken and I had eaten there several times over the last few years and their specialty of New Orleans food is tasty. And I was right. Their food was good. The room at the back of the restaurant was large and nicely decorated for Christmas so we fit nicely in the space. Everyone was pleased with the food and the location so I was pleased with the choice. I tend to repeat a place for a second year so I suspect I will book the place for next year. Once upon a time many years ago I decided to see what would happen if I never told anyway it was my birthday. What happened was absolutely nothing. That was no fun so next year I told everyone I knew that my birthday was coming up and I planned a party for myself. I never actually told people it was my birthday, but I knew. I have had an event the first weekend of December ever since. For years I held an ice skating party at Wheaton Ice Rink. Since we have moved to Mississippi, I book the party at a restaurant. For three years we held it at Sombra, a Mexican restaurant. Then for the past two years we held it at The Yacht Club. Ken attended last year and enjoyed himself. Now this year I selected Drago's which was a popular choice. Much to my surprise, some folks had never eaten there until tonight. Most importantly, everyone had a good time, including me. I have held a party for myself for over 50 years so there is no reason to quit. So here I go to 83 next year.

December 5, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. The Festival of Lights.

For the past few years I have listened to the concert on TV, but this year friend Eleanor took to the live concert at Mississippi College. The Festival of Lights is a concert featuring the Mississippi College Singers. The choir sings with no accompaniment. Most singers are music majors and are talented along with being wonderful singers. The choir is wonderful. They can sing that etherial angelic sound of an accapelo choir as well as sing forcefully with great energy. The concert was a delight and I enjoyed every minute. The concert proceeds with nothing to interrupt the flow. One item leads to the next with no interruption, not even clapping. It was not until the end after the choir had left that the the audience stood and clapped and cheered. Along with the choir was a man playing the cello accompanied on the piano. Along with the Christmas story readings from the scriptures, the cello gave a break for the choir along with a change of sound. The whole evening was world class. The old chapel was packed. The concerts are held three nights along with the rehearsal open to the public. The concert was a delight for me especially since Eleanor took me as a birthday gift to me. Jim and Eleanor came, along with their girls Gabriella and Isabel. Even the girls loved the concert. This evening was quite remarkable. The young people stood the whole evening with no books in sight. The choir members memorized all their pieces along with every verse of the Carols. One charming aspect of the evening was the enthusiasm of the choir members. It was clear they loved to sing. Along with me and the rest of the audience, they seemed to enjoy every minute of the concert. This choir is wonderful.

December 4, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Walking.

Florence told me not to walk by myself. When she was out for a walk in Florida on a perfectly lovely day, she woke up in the emergency room of the local hospital. She was feeling fine but something happened. Even after three days of tests, no one figured out what was the matter. But some stranger called 911 and she was taken to the hospital. Eventually she woke up. Her advice to me was to never walk alone. But of course, I do it all the time in my neighborhood. Kashina does not like to walk so she takes me to places where I can walk, such as the grocery store or the drug store where she can watch me from a distance. Today we decided to go to the Northside Mall. I wanted to see the decorations and I thought that the place would not be crowded. First we both had pedicures, only the second one she had in her life. Next we went to the Mall so I could walk. I needed to carry my purse because we were going to the Food Court for lunch. I thought I could walk freely because I assumed that the Mall would be mostly empty. I had heard that no one shops in real stores. But the place was crowded so in order to walk, I needed to hold Kashina's arm, which is not easy for long distances. While Kashina was in the restroom, I spotted a rack of children's buggies. The little cart looked like a fancy little car for the child, with two spots on the handle for drinks, along with a tall pole that alerts other people. I decided it would be perfect for me so when Kashina returned we used my credit card and paid the money which released the cart. I was set. Now I could walk with my cart and not bump into people, or have them not bump into me. I could walk faster with my own cart and at the beginning of each isle, Kashina would stand and watch as I walked to the end and back. I feel sure I looked odd but did not care. My walk was easier with a children buggy. Kashina and I decided that the next time I go to the Mall to walk we will take a walker....and save money. And the Christmas decorations were pretty. We almost had a picture of the both of us with Santa but we saved our money. Next time we will go walking at the Renaissance Mall which is all outdoors. We will need warmer weather.

December 3, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Christmas Party.

Since I have become old and somewhat infirm I have not figured out how to handle parties. All my life my pattern at parties was the same: I moved around the room and talked with people. Sometimes I served food just to give me something to do and to give me the opportunity to talk to people. But now, I have not figured out a successful routine. I have difficulty walking around in crowds of people because I bump into them. And if I am in an unfamiliar room, I am prone to run into furniture. For the last two parties, I have found a spot in a corner and stayed there. I always find a place with chairs beside me so I talk to people who sit beside me. My problem is that they may not be the people I want to meet. But I am stuck, until they move. So I do not like my present system but I do not know what to do about it. This Sunday evening, the neighborhood will hold their annual Christmas party. Ken and I have never attended. The party starts at 6:00, which means that it will be dark. And Ken had difficulty eating in public so he preferred to stay home. I am not going this year either. For me, going out by myself at night is impossible and as no one has offered to come and take me I will stay home. I do feel like Scrooge. But trying to get around in a strange house full of furniture is not easy for me, even if the house is empty. I could ask a friend in the neighborhood to take me but decided to stay home. Until the last few years, we never missed a party but not now, especially in the evening. But I will figure out a system more to my liking in general at parties. I might ask a good friend or relative to let me take their arm while I circulate. That might work. But for now, I will stay home.

December 2, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Murray Lewin.

I met Murray in 1953, when we moved to Toronto and started attending the Danforth Corps of the Salvation Army. He was just a few months younger than me and he was one of the group of kids who hung out together at church. I have been friends with him ever since. He died on Sunday. We called him Moose because he was so big. And he was funny. His health was not good the past few years but he was always enthusiastic about what he was doing, even though his activities were limited. He went to work as a printer right out of high school and worked in the same print shop for 46 years. His father died when Murray was three. His brother was 8 years his senior. Murrays mother took in foster children in order to pay the bills. She was a nice lady and she raised two fine boys. His wife, Fairie, was a long time family friend. In fact I have known her my whole life. Interesting to note that Murray and Fairie's daughter married the son of Marg and Eric, another set of good friends. Ken and I worked at a camp just outside of Boston in the summer of 1960. Moose drove down to visit us while we were there. One Saturday night Ken and I along with Moose convinced Sharon, the head lady counselor to sneak out of camp to get a pizza. We had a good time, then drove home. But Murray had gone the wrong way and we soon discovered that we were close to Provincetown, which was a long way from home. I think that was the only naughty thing Sharon ever did. But we were able to get back into camp with no trouble. Moose thought the whole thing funny. I will miss Moose. I talked with Fairie tonight. She too must get used to living alone. I urged her to think of all the things she was grateful for, and list them every morning. It will work.

December 1, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Les Miserables.

I have no idea how I missed this program when it was first held in 2010. Perhaps it had never been shown on TV before now. Tonight, PBS showed the 25th anniversary concert of the musical. It was a fund raiser but I just switched to the football game, which Houston won. The concert was magnificent. I loved every minute. I have seen the musical on stage two or three times so I know the story and songs but the singing was wonderful. It was worth watching for sure. After the concert was over, the 4 leading mens characters over the 25 years cane on the stage and they all four sang several songs together. The leading ladies did the same. It was quite an exciting time. The tunes keep running through my mind, one after an other. I felt grateful to PBS for showing such a wonderful concert. I felt grateful that I spotted it. I enjoyed a wonderful concert and never left home. What a blessing.