May 31, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Making the Bed.

Last night, I slept on Ken's side of the bed. I did it because I had slept on my side of the bed for a week so the sheets needed to be changed. But as I only slept on half of the sheets, I moved to the other side of the bed. It certainly made sense to me. When Suzanne is here on the weekend I will ask her to help me change the sheets. Making the bed is difficult for me. My fingers will not pull the fitted sheets down properly so for the last several years I have asked Christina to help. Or I struggled all by myself. Last year when Kashina was helping us, I asked her to help me, which she did. But soon she asked me to have her to it herself. "I can make the bed faster by myself." she said. And she was correct. She changes the bed every Sunday morning. Now I am cheating. I am sleeping on clean sheets which are on the other side of the bed where I slept last week. On Ken's side was a small bedside table with two drawers. He ordered and assembled it the last time we were here in 2017. His bedside table was a lovely piano bench but it did not have drawers. As I was going to bed last night on his side, I discovered that the drawers were full. Tomorrow I will take everything out and if valuable give the contents to David. I made a discovery sleeping on those clean sheets. Being lazy has rewards.

May 30, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Alone At the Lake.

Tuppen, Marilyn and I talked about living alone. Marilyn suggested at one point that living alone has advantages which was the same thing that my friend Butch said to me. Marilyn spelled out lots of things that were easier for her since Richard died several years ago. Things like eating meals. Both when she eats and what she eats is all up to her. No discussions. And the television. They had one TV so often disagreement were raised as to what to watch. And her house stays tidy. Also where and when vacations are taken are all up to her. But what we all agreed was that we miss the discussions with our significant other. The men in our lives were interesting smart people and they brought to our table ideas they had read. For that there is no substitution. But we all read as much as possible and try to find our own new ideas. Now I have been living part time at the lake for 23 years. Now I am learning to live by myself. I had successfully learned to live happily in Mississippi but living here is different. When the Family is here everything seems the same as when Ken was alive. But by my myself is very different. I am using some of the same habits as in Mississippi. I read every morning. I walk every afternoon. I keep up with e mails. And I find something interesting on TV. The French Open Tennis is on now so I am watching a bit of it. And I watched two hockey games since I have been here. Saturday, the Family will come and David and the twins will stay over until Monday afternoon. My plan to stay at the lake included a visit here with Alice Anne but she had to cancel due to an ill dog. Robbie and Joyce are coming June 7. I am enjoying the lake. The temperature is perfect and I have settled in nicely. Everything works and my chargers are in place. Lyft works at the lake and Suzanne left me a great assortment of food. I have learned to enjoy myself at the lake which is a good thing. This is a lovely place to live.

May 29, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Dinner.

Our plan was to go out to dinner but when I called the best restaurant in Canyon Lake, I discovered that they were closed on Tuesday. Gennaro's is a wonderful Italian bistro. Three years ago we ate there so Marilyn and Tuppen were looking forward to dining there but no luck. My next option was a new restaurant in the old bakery but they are only open for dinner on Friday and Saturday. Once again, no luck. We discussed options which were all on the other side of the lake, which meant more driving. Marilyn suggested ordering pizza. I recommended that we raid the fridge. Suzanne kindly left me lots of food, which included a rotisserie chicken along with the left over vegetables from Sunday dinner. We three got busy. Tuppen cut up the chicken, Marilyn sautéed the vegetables and I set the table. We ate a delicious dinner which took us ten minutes to prepare. And we ate fresh cut vegetables left over too. After dinner we sat on the deck enjoying the cool air and breeze. They drank a cup of coffee. No dessert for us last night. We three were pleased with our decision to stay home and enjoy Suzanne's gifts. Finally we were forced inside because it felt too cool. The temperature was 75. Our dinner was simple and easy. And it hit the spot.

May 28, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Old Friends.

Nothing better than getting together with old friends. Marilyn and Tuppen have driven here from Houston to visit me at the lake. They arrived just after 2:00. We have been talking ever since. We knew each other in Galveston in the 60s. We were friends back then and we are friends now. Our paths have gone different ways but here we are together again. Tuppen was married to Gleb, who at the time was a medical student. He was a friendly guy and there was nothing to tell you that at some time he was going to go off the rails. But he did. He worked in Houston and they bought a lovely old home. Then he decided to have a divorce. Now he lives in China. We attended the film festivals together in Galveston and entertained each other in our homes. Only once did Ken mention to me that he thought that Gleb was odd. I just liked him and his Norwegian wife Tuppen, who was and still is a Physical Therapist at 79. Marilyn and her husband George were both Internal Medicine Residents in Galveston. They were married before medical school. They had three children. After we moved to Maryland, they came to visit us. At the time, George was obsessed with the Watergate hearings. He insisted in watching every minute, even refusing to eat dinner at the table. We enjoyed their visit but Ken commented that he thought that George was going to have difficulty in the future because he seemed to care nothing except what he wanted to do. Ken was correct. George went to law school and graduated. But he could not find a job that combined his two degrees so he went to work at a clinic, which he could have done right after his residency. Marilyn was working as a Doctor for the City of Houston. Three years later he took up with the secretary and asked for a divorce. Then he became an alcoholic. And he died young. Ken was correct. George had a lot of trouble in his life. But Tuppen and Marilyn have thrived in Houston. Now they come to visit me every few years and we play catch up. Both Marilyn and I live alone now. Tuppen still works 32 hours a week. She visits her family each year in Norway. I appreciate them driving to visit me at the lake. Some year they might even get to Mississippi. That would be another happy day when the three friends get together again for more talking.

May 27, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Boating.

Lots and lots of boats were out yesterday on Canyon Lake. Less number today. Ever since we have been here, we have lots of wind which I thought would discourage the boater community but people were on the water even if the water was choppy and rough. Water skiing was impossible but tubing was fine. Today around noon, Suzanne went out on their boat, purchased last year. It is built like a tank. It is a pontoon boat with three pontoons and is wide and long. It seats 14 con comfortable with seats all around the outside with one seat facing front for the driver. It is a perfect family boat. First thing they did was pick up Bonnie from in front of their house. They drove around a bit. Then Abigail texted Suzanne to say she was ready so they picked her up from in front of our place. They bring the bow up to the shore and Abby just steps onto the boat through a little door. Easy for her. Next, Debbie and Heath called to be picked up along with their two daughters. Their son who was here for dinner went to camp today. Next Kim and her daughter Amy were ready to come on board so they all headed out to a quiet part of the water to tube. They had all taken lunch food with them and Suzanne always takes a cooler of water and drinks so the had lunch. When they were warm they got in the water to cool off although Suzanne said the water was too cool for her to stay in the water for long. Everyone arrived home just after 5:00. Samantha has gone with David to return the boat to the marina, then drive his truck back home here. They all enjoyed their afternoon on the water. I on the other hand enjoy a boat trip around the lake but I am not in love with sitting all afternoon on a boat, even a boat that is spacious and comfortable. Also there were two dogs on the boat which would have made it difficult to move around on the boat. Perhaps I was not brought up on a boat but I prefer dry land. I was perfectly happy to have them all head out at noon and leave me home to read. But I am definitely in the minority. The lake is full of happy people enjoying their boat on Canyon Lake.

MAY 26, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Life at the Lake.

As I sit at the counter writing this wee web blog, the large room is filling with friends and their children. Friends who live in Austin, Heath and Debbie, are at their lake house for the weekend and they have come for a group dinner along with their three children. Soon Bonnie and Wade will arrive with their son who has just graduated from high school. Soon Allison and Samantha are on the way from a graduation party and will bring three cars of more teenagers. Our party is growing. This afternoon, David and Suzanne and Abigail along with Debbie and Heath and their children spent the whole afternoon on the boat, tubing and swimming. Late this morning David and Suzanne took me on a sedate trip on the lake. We cruised slowly past all the homes we can only see from the road. I loved every minute. Yesterday I asked Samantha what she liked about being at the lake. We have owned this home for over 23 years so she has been coming here all her life. But often as kids get older they no longer enjoy weekend homes but the girls here still love living at the lake. I wondered what she thought about it. Her answer surprised me. She said she loves coming to the lake because she has nothing to worry about. She leaves school work at home. And she loves the lack of a schedule. She rests and water skis and tubes. And she sleeps in. The most important thing about being at the lake is that she does not worry about anything. And she loves being at the lake. This evening is a perfect example of life at the lake. Friends coming to dinner. Kids about to play a game. More friends soon arriving . We did not realize all those years ago how important the lake has in the life of the grandchildren. Ken has said that owning a country home has two benefits. First is the enjoyment of being there. And next is thinking about it in your mind when things are difficult at work or school. This simple home has done everything the four of us hoped for when we purchased it together 23 years ago. Life at the lake is delightful for both children and adults.

May 25, 2019. Canyon Lake, Texas. Upgrades.

In my absence a new fence has been installed in the back yard. When we first bought the lake house we put in a chain link fence to keep in the dogs and the child. It was ugly but was cost effective and did the job. Last year David and Suzanne replaced that ugly fence. Now we have a beautiful iron fence, which is a definite upgrade. They both decided that it was time. And Moose can not open the latch on the gate down by the water. The second upgrade I noted upon arrival was the cutlery. We had been using inferior flat ware ever since we bought the place. Odds and ends were brought from Suzanne's grandmother, our farm and from Suzanne's parents cast offs. And we were always running out of forks or spoons. But no more. Suzanne bought multiple dozens of cutlery. Now they are arranged in the kitchen drawers opposite the dishwasher. We are set for whomever comes to dine. Once again, a definite upgrade. The last time we were here in 2017, Ken needed more tables close to him. And we had moved our clothes from the ranch to the lake house so we moved two chests into our bedroom plus one bedside table. The function worked well for Ken but when I looked at the room last evening I knew the room was too full. Today Suzanne and David removed two chests and one piano bench from the room. The room now looks just as it used to look and is no longer crowded. I am pleased. Again the room is an upgrade. David and Suzanne have just gone to the Marina to pick up their boat which was new in 2018. It is a good sized pontoon boat. David got rid of his last boat a few years ago but last year he sold the two jet boats and purchased a family sized boat. The engine is fast enough for water skiing and tubing and will carry many people comfortably. I am not sure I will be able to get on and off the boat so perhaps I will admire it from afar. Once again, this boat is an upgrade for the family.., The lake house is looking up.

May 24, 2019. San Antonio. Bees and Gardens.

Son David loved his bees. And the whole family appreciated the honey. Two years ago, all his hives died. All of them. He kept two hives at the back of his yard plus four at a friends ranch in Comfort, a town an hours drive away. And he had a demonstration hive, kept in his backyard office, which was wonderful to watch the bees in action. David was not pleased with the death of his bees so for awhile he had no bees. He wondered if something he did caused the bees to die so he continued to read about bees. Three weeks ago he decided to get another hive which is now in his demonstration hive. Watching the bees work is endlessly interesting. Before dark last evening we went to watch. We could not find the Queen but all the others were busily doing their job. While I watched, several bees were getting rid of an insect that had gotten into the hive. Eventually that insect would be outside pushed by the bees. I loved watching them. After a few weeks, David will buy two more hives for his yard. He gets great pleasure with his bees. Another major interest of David is his yard and garden. When they moved into their home 18 years ago, the yard was just grass and a few bushes. Now it is lush and gorgeous. His plantings are beautiful everywhere you look. Ken who himself was an excellent gardener always admired David's yards. In the front it is ordinary. But the back yard is magnificent. His roses are in bloom and are beautiful and he has planted flowers around the yard. His vegetable garden provided the family with produce. The newest section of his back yard is the cutting garden. David parks his truck at the back of the yard so every evening when he comes up to the house he cuts flowers for Suzanne to arrange for the house. When I arrived, there was a vase of flowers on the coffee table in the living room and in the middle of the kitchen table. All the flowers came from David's cutting garden. David is pleased with both his bees and his garden as are all other family members. I have always wanted a cutting garden but Ken was not much interested in flowers. But fortunately, David loves flowers as well as bushes. It is a great addition to his yard. I love his back yard and am delighted to see it again. Now this afternoon we will drive to the lake house for the holiday weekend. The Internet will be connected tomorrow morning... we hope. So here we go again. Another change of scene.

May 23, 2019. San Antonio, Texas. Pathetic.

The twins were still asleep. Abigail had gone to work as was Suzanne and David so I was on my own to get my breakfast. Suzanne had kindly told me everything that was in the fridge I could use for breakfast so I knew there were many options. Suzanne asked me if she should set out the food for me but I declined her kind off, which turned out to be a mistake. The first thing I tried to do was to make coffee. I could not read the names on the pods so finally got my reading glasses and made coffee. Next I decided to make toast. Suzanne had told me that the bread was in the fridge but Suzanne's fridge is not like mine, which is mostly empty. Her's if full and I could not find the bread. I looked hard but finally decided to eat what I could see, which was raspberries and yoghurt. And I found a banana. So that was what I ate. And it was good. For lunch I asked Allison to tell me what is in the fridge. She call things out to me and I chose to make and eat a chicken salad sandwich and olives. It was clear to me that I could not operate in another persons refrigerator, especially when the fridge is packed with goodies. It is pathetic but true.

May 22, 2019. San Antonio, Texas. Family.

You can not beat being with family. This evening we ate dinner together. David had smoked the pork chops over Easter. Suzanne cooked fried potatoes and broccoli and we dined like kings. I was happy to be back in Texas. Today everything went perfectly. Kashina took me to the airport early. The flight left Jackson on time. T got to my next flight with 20 minutes wait until boarding and I arrived in San Antonio early. David checks the flights and can get to the airport from his office in time for the person to get to the curb. So he pulled up just as I walked out the door. I am always astonished when everything works perfectly as planned. So here I am. David and I had lunch together at home eating last nights stir fried dinner, made by Suzanne. It was delicious. I slept while David went back to work. I sat outside enjoying the warmth while drinking my orange drink and patting Moose. One by one, family members appeared. We sat outside and retreated to the living room for appetizer of olives, cheese and apples. And more talking. Now we are all all watching softball on TV. I will go to bed early. I am delighted to be in Texas to see the family. And to see the two new large pieces of art David and Suzanne purchased since the last time we were here. I feel fortunate to be here. And I had no difficulty at all. Being here with the family is worth the journey

May 21, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. On The Road.

Being on the road means keeping your mind alert at all times. Gill and I decided that when on the road, one must keep all your ducks in a row at all times. You must stay alert. So tomorrow I have two short flights, first to Houston then to San Antonio. Then I get to see my Texas Family, except for Sarah who is still in Australia. I am especially keen to see David. I have not seen him since his surgery. Abigail will be there along with the twins and of course, Suzanne who looks after me very well. And of course, I always am pleased to see Moose who is a wonderful dog. So I am ready to get on the road. Last year we did not spend any time in Texas and we missed it. David is picking me up. I did have a bit of trouble checking in on line. In fact, I was never able to do it but clever Christina did it for me. It took me almost an hour to accomplish this easy task, all to no avail. I gave up, knowing that I could check in at the airport. But Christa came to my rescue as she always does. I will have some work to do at the lake organizing my clothes. I think David and Suzanne have removed Kens belongings but I will probably have to get the bedroom and closet in proper order. We will all go to the lake house for the holiday weekend. Then I will stay at the lake by myself, which will be new to me. I have learned to live by myself in Mississippi. Now I must figure it out at Canyon Lake. I am ready. My little carry on is at the front door along with my backpack. Kashina is coming to stay the night with me and drive me to the airport early. My flight is 7:00. Now here I go.

May 20, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Charlene.

Charlene is in my BSF group. She takes her studies seriously. And she is a nice lady. She is a retired nurse and always worked the night shift because she was a single Mom and wanted to be home when her three children were home. At night she hired a mature babysitter to stay with the children. She had the same babysitter for 20 years. The baby sitter stopped working for Charlene at age 82. The aspect of Charlene that I like so much is she is never complaining. When she was a stay at home Mom, her husband complained about something so Charlene was upset but suggested that if he did not like how she was doing he could move out. And he did. She was devastated but regrouped and went to work and continued to live a good life with not a bit of bitterness. After her children married and had their own children she remarried a man from her church. She is a happy, outgoing enthusiastic lady and I like her. BSF is over for the season but on Friday she called to see if I wanted to go out for lunch with her and her friend Margaret. I was delighted with the invitation so today she picked me up and we three went to McAllisters, a deli that serves good sandwiches and salads. Charlene lives in Brandon, on the other side of the reservoir. Her home is about 30 minutes away. Charlene noted that I take Lyft to BSF and she knows that Linda drives me home. But one day when my group had lunch together she offered to drive me home. She has driven me home ever since when Linda is not attending BFS. Our lunch was pleasant. I discovered that friend Margaret is a gardener. She just froze 15r bags of beens and tonight she must shell butter beans. And they wanted to know how and when I ever ended up in Nova Scotia. Margaret has been rooted in Mississippi and has never been able to travel until now. But unfortunately her husband has heart disease and does not with to leave his doctors. But he does not mind if she goes away so she has organized trips with her lady friends. Early this year they spent a week in the Smoky Mountains and this fall they have rented a house in Charleston. My life is different and she is amazed. But she is a friend and I was delighted she invited me out for lunch. I have been so grateful for her kindnesses over this year that I took them out for lunch. I can not drive them anywhere but I am able to pay the bill.

May 19, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Update.

Kate begins work at Mississippi University Hospital on May 28. She was hired to work on the Cardiology floor. She will begin on the step down section. For three months she will have orientation. Fortunately, she will be able to go with the family to both Maine and Nova Scotia and will be gone for two weeks before returning for the rest of her orientation. Her RN exam will be held on June 6. As it is a comprehensive exam Kate is anxious. But I told her that she has done everything else in her life well so her exam will turn out well too. She will be pleased when the exam is behind her and her vacation in the north will soon arrive. My cruise line for May of 2020 is Pearl Seas Cruises. My ship is The Pearl Mist. I begin in Portland, Maine and end in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Ken and I went down the St. Lawrence River in August 1963 when we took a freighter cruise to help Ken recover from his surgery. We always wanted to take the trip up the river but we never made it back. I will do in next year. The pressure in my right eye is improving. The left remains fine at 12. After the surgery called needling, my right pressure was a 4, which is too low. Now it is 7 so improving. I will have my right eye refracted so I will have better vision in that eye. I will do it in Liverpool. On Wednesday early I fly to Texas. Nothing flies direct from Jackson so I fly to Houston, then San Antonio where I stay either with David and Suzanne or at the lake. On June 13 I fly to Halifax via Chicago. I will remain until Sept. 30 at Gull Bay, in Western Head. And thus ends the update of my life.

May 18, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. A Graduation Party.

The graduation Party was splendid. I sat in a comfortable chair in the family room adjacent to the kitchen and stayed there all evening. The group in the room rotated so by the time I was ready to leave I had talked to everyone present. The party was for Ian and Godfrey, twin sons of friends Eleanor and Jim. Next year they will attend Mississippi College but for now they are celebrating their graduation from high school. The house is a wonderful place for a party and I always enjoy being in that home. It is a special place. I took a Lyft there and Christina brought me home. Eleanor is a wonderful cook and we ate her good cooking of pulled pork barbecue sandwiches, brisket, potato salad, Cole slaw and baked beans. Brownies for dessert. Delicious food. And good company. I got to talk with every one I know and like. The evening was wonderful. Christina brought me a plate of food along with a dessert. So all I did all evening was talk with friends. The children stopped by to say hello but they stayed on the balcony or basketball court. These home schooled kids know how to look after themselves. Two other cousins graduated from high school this year. One daughter will attend the University of Mississippi at Oxford. Another will attend a Junior College and will take welding. These young peole are getting on with their lives. It is very exciting. I thoroughly enjoyed the celebration and was delighted to be invited. They are their parents are my Mississippi friends and for them I am grateful.

May 17, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. A Rite of Spring.

Here we were sitting like bumps on a log, waiting for the action to begin. Soon enough, Kate was the first to begin. Next was Mary Frances and finally me. We were all having a pedicure. Along with the blossoms, we have a pedicure together to get us ready for the summer. We have done it ever since we all moved to Mississippi. Because of Molly's school, we three were the only ones to have the pedicure today. But we had fun. And we all have beautiful toes. I was in the middle so we three chattered away while we waited and then again when our feet were being worked on. Almost nothing is better than chatting with your grandchildren with no other adults present. The three people working on us asked the girls lots of questions. So we talked about Kate's graduation and her beginning work. And they could not tell which girl was older. For her graduation, Kate received a cardiology stethoscope from David and Suzanne. She was thrilled and told me about it this morning. And I gave her the choice of either money or a piece of art which she told me today. She chose money, clever child. Next we went to Amerigo for lunch, named the best Italian restaurant in Mississippi. And we talked some more. I had taken a Lyft to the nail place but Mary Frances drove me home, with Kate giving instructions from the back seat. Our morning was delightful, another of our Rites of Spring here in Mississippi.

May 16, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. On A Roll.

On May 22, 2020, I will board a ship in Portland, Maine. The cruise will travel the coast of Nova Scotia, visit Newfoundland then go up the St. Lawrence River, stopping at all the important places and finally stopping at Toronto. But I stay on the ship because I cruise the Great Lakes and Georgian Bay, ending in Milwaukee on June 17 when I plan to fly to Nova Scotia. The cruise line has twelve singles cabins. Gill has been paying double for all her cruises so when I noticed that the cruises I was interested in had singles cabins I asked for a brochure. I discovered they have only 12 on each ship. I called the cruise line and the pleasant lady told me that singles cabins sell quickly. I really wanted to leave Halifax in the Fall to take in the Autumn trees but that would not work. We discussed all options and finally decided that the best cruise would be in the Spring. So I booked it and will do it all my myself. Ken and I had wanted to take that cruise so I am doing it on my own. Traveling by myself is difficult but on the ship I will be in a protected environment with lots of people to help. As Ken pointed out to me when I was traveling to Ontario for the family wedding in September, I am unstable on my feet and I have bad vision. But I had no trouble. And I will ask for help. I have gotten good at asking. So the cruise is booked, for good or ill. I hope there is heat in the cabins!!

May 15, 2019.Madison, Mississippi. The Christmas Party.

On the first Friday of December we have always hosted a pre Christmas party. The date coincides with my birthday so it is really my birthday party. But we don't tell anyone. Years ago we hosted a skating party at Wheaton Ice Rink. Then our close friends would come to our house for dinner. We have continued the custom in Mississippi by inviting our friends and their children for dinner. For several years we ate at a Mexican restaurant and for the past two years we held the party at the Yacht Club. But I do not like to do the same thing in a row so I have been thinking of what to do. Last year a New Mexican restaurant opened close to us on Old Canton Road. Ken and I ate lunch there last year and they told me that they had space for us to use for our party. But Kashina and I looked at the space last week and determined it would be too small. I decided on Drago's Seafood restaurant, next to the Hilton Hotel where David and Suzanne stay. I know it is too early to book a party for December but the good places fill up with the holiday parties so I know to book early. We are set for the party at Drago's on December 6, 2019. I have spoken to the director of catering and the room is reserved for us. When I return in October we will talk again and make decisions for the food. The restaurant is a New Orleans style restaurant and their menu looks attractive. I will select a buffet as it is much easier for the children. I am delighted to have this task done. Sunday our family will have lunch at Drago's so we can look at the room to be sure it is large enough. My job is half over. Selecting the food will be easy. Christina does the invitations which we send via e mail. I know it is early to book a Christmas party in May, but I am happy the selection is behind me. Whew.

May 14, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Mother's Day.

I have become a bit of a freeloader. Easter dinner found me at the home of Linda Creath, the Mother of Christina, my daughter in law. And I spent Mother's Day there too. I enjoyed the food and the company. Our happy group consisted of Linda, Christina, Kate, Mary Frances, Molly and me. I overheard a funny conversation while sitting on a bench waiting for my Lyft. I had attended church at The Salvation Army and a group of ladies were waiting to go out for lunch together, along with four retired officers. The group go out for Sunday lunch together each week, using a Salvation Army van so they could all go together. Evidently, they visit different restaurants but last Sunday, on Mother's Day, they were gong to Wendy's because "no one would take their Mother to Wendy's for a special dinner," one said. Brilliant idea. My day was lovely. Brad, a friend of David and Andrew from school called to chat. We talked for 45 minutes, catching up on everything under the sun. Son David called to wish me Happy Mother's Day. And we talked too. Nothing pleases me more than talking to David on the phone. And I loved chattering away with Brad too. I enjoy talking on the phone. I know telephone talk is out of fashion. People text rather than talk. But I love friends to phone me. It pleases me to hear the voice. My Mother's Day was pleasant. My Father did not approve of the day. "Mothers should be honored every day, not just once a year." said Norman Buckley. But on Sunday we honored Mothers present and past. And we were grateful for our Mothers and Grandmothers and remembered them in our prayers.

May 13, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Mondays.

Mondays are an open day for me. No one comes to work here at home and I have no fixed appointments. My friend Alice Anne suggested to me that from now on, what happens to me must be manufactured by me. "Nothing will occur without your decisions," said Alice Anne. Ken was a person with hundreds of ideas so often he would think of what we wanted us to do and I would put the plan into action. Now I must do both. I find something to do on a Monday. Last week I invited Greta Barbour to have lunch with me today at Amerigo, her favorite restaurant. I took a Lyft and met her there. When I use Lyft, I never know if the driver will arrive in 6 minutes or 15 so I must assume for 15 so as not to be late. I do not like to be late when I am the hostess. I am usually early so by now have memorized the menu. The luncheon date breaks up my long day when I am alone. Greta Barbour is a good friend and we had a lively conversation. And we ate good food. Greta Barbour has a strong willed 15 year old daughter, who I like very much. On Saturday, the daughter had a piano competition at 9:00. At breakfast she announced that she would not go. After a talk with her father she decidied to go and play, and she did. And she did well. She is playing in another competition this weekend but this one will be fine. Her pieces are harder and she likes them. When all was said and done, she did not like the piece she was playing because it was too easy for her. So Greta Barbour and I enjoyed discussing the joys and perils of living with strong willed children. And Greta Barbour brought me home. After my short nap, I went walking in the neighborhood. That ended my Monday. My evenings are all the same and work well for me. I am still wearing my evening gown. Today my Monday was excellent.

May 12, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. My Meals.

Often I would ask my Mother what she had eaten that evening for dinner. I suspected that she was not eating properly. My Mother was thin and worked full time. And she lived by herself. Her response was not encouraging. "I ate a fried egg sandwich," she would say. She often complained that cooking for one was not fun so she mostly did not cook much. Even though I now live by myself, I eat well. My system works perfectly so I eat healthy nourishing food. Dreisys, my Cuban cook, prepares my meals at her own home. Saturday morning she brings over the food in containers still warm. After a bit, I put the containers in the fridge. Last week is she brought the following: 1. White rice, cooked and flavored. 2. Beef cut into small bite sized pieces with a small amount of sauce. The meat was very center and succulent. 3. Fish in a light sauce, nicely flavored. 4. Green beans and squash cooked together and flavored nicely. 5. Lentil soup made with chunks of beef. I ate on that food all week and put a container of the soup into the freezer for when I return. My Mother should have had a cook like mine. I eat well every day and enjoy every bite. My meals are excellent thanks to my Cuban cook.

May 11, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Refrigerators.

In the garage in Nova Scotia is a refrigerator that is almost 40 years old. It works like a charm even though I know it is inefficient. In the kitchen is a newer fridge and has already needed to be repaired once due to leaking water. It is not new, perhaps 18 years old. On Thursday, I received an e mail saying that the kitchen fridge was not cooling and water was all over the floor. Everything in the freezer had melted and mold had formed in the interior. It was working fine last week, but now it is not working at all. I picked up the e mail at 2:00. The modern world is wonderful. I decided to replace both refrigerators. In years past, Sears would have been the company to call but they do longer have a presence in Liverpool. A company McPhersons has taken over the old Sears store and they sell appliances so I called them. They had one counter deep fridge so I bought it. Unfortunately it was stainless and a top of the line Fridgedaire so expensive. And I bought a simple Whirlpool fridge for the garage. Now the garage fridge will not leak. By 3:00, both appliances had been purchased and paid for. I am set for the summer. Now the company will need to contact Mary and Walt for access to haul away both old fridges and install the new ones. This is a wonderful world.

May 10, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Graduation Day.

Our Kate graduated this afternoon from Mississippi College. I was beaming with pride as she walked across the stage. And she graduated Cum Laud. She now has a Batchelor of Science degree in Nursing. Next Kate will write the RN boards to become a Registered Nurse. She has already accepted a position at the University of Mississippi Hospital, working on the Cardiology floor. Kate was ready to be finished with nursing school. She has been attentive and diligent. Now she is pleased to be finished. The College cleverly graduated the students in small groups so today was just for the nursing school. The decision was a blessing for parents and friends because the graduation was finished on 75 minutes. And the speeches were blessedly short. So the whole graduation was done efficiently. Kashina came to the graduation so she drove me. We arrived just ten minutes prior to the celebration and were able to sit on comfortable chair in perfect sight of the speakers. And I had a perfect view of Kate as she sat with her fellow student in their chairs on the floor of the coliseum. The original plan was for the graduation to be held outdoors but the weather forecast was for rain so on Wednesday the decision was made to move the ceremony indoors, which was a great. blessing for me. Kashina and I wisely left as the last hymn was sung to avoid the crush of people. Kate asked to dine on Japanese food to celebrate. And she asked to eat at home. We celebrated in style, toasting Kate with champagne. Linda provided the dinner feast and picked up the food while I just enjoyed the evening. I had a wonderful time talking to the family and dining on good food. Peter flew in for the graduation but will go home tomorrow to attend his daughters recital. Now that Ken is not here to answer or medications questions, Kate will be the medical expert of the family. We are all delighted with her accomplishments and I give hearty congratulations to our dear Kate.

May 9, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Another Storm.

The forecast was for a storm this morning. Friend Linda called me to tell me that she was staying home from BSF because the storm was beginning to kick up in her neighborhood. Being a Canadian, I decided to call for my Lyft. By the time he arrived 6 minutes later the rain was pelting down. The poor driver was forced to drive very slowly in order to see anything. Then the tornado sirens went off, coming through the radio and his cell phone. I began to think this decision to go out was not smart. The driver took me right to the portico of the church but the rain was falling so hard and the wind brought the rain sideways, I got wet even though I was undercover. I was wearing a rain coat too. A Man helped me into the church and took me down the hall on the first floor. As the tornado siren was still on, everyone had been taken to an interior room, the safest room in the building. Very soon the all clear was sounded and we went upstairs. It rained so hard you could not hear across the room. Then the signal was set for flash floods. But as we were on the second floor we stayed in our place. For over an hour the rain fell hard, just pelting on the roof and windows. But by the time we were ready to leave, it was merely spitting. Charlene drove me home in her SUV, which was a good thing because we drove through high spots on the roads. On both sides of Rice Road adjacent to the Reservoir the ground had several feet of sitting water. I got home with no trouble but I was happy to be home safe and sound. My decision to call Lyft was probably not the smartest decision of my life. It was exciting driving to BSF and the driver was not nervous. He just slowed down. These storms in Mississippi are interesting but most Mississippians just stay home. But not me. The show must go on.

May 8, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. My Day.

This evening is going to end with a Big Bang. The rain and wind have both started up. A tornado watch is in place. A big thunder storm is coming. Up until now, my day was quiet. But now it will be busy and noisy. Yesterday I had an ultra sound test of my right carrotted artery. My left is blocked so the Cardiologist wants to be sure the right stays open. When we first moved here he wanted the test every 6 months. I convinced him that every year should be OK and perhaps every 2 years. He has agreed. If there is no change , he agrees that every 2 years is OK. So in 2021 I must have another test. But not before. Nifty. Today I did what I am not supposed to do when I live alone. I stayed home all day. by myself. And I did not leave the house, even to get the mail. I am still in my nightshirt. Horrors. But I got a lot done. I am beginning to organize for the summer. And I sorted the pile of mail needing attention. The older I get the more time I need to get ready for a trip. So I plan ahead. I do not know why but the day before I leave for a journey my brain stops working. So I have set my case on the dining table and already have put in the Canadian money. So my day was valuable. And I read all morning. Now I want to end this wee web log before the Big Bang, when I might not have power. First I must get a flashlight. This storm sounds big. But my day was pleasant and productive. Hurrah for me.

May 7, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Entertaining.

Success in life requires change. New normal behavior is always just around the corner. I now have a new system of entertaining. Last evening was a perfect example. For the past several weeks I have gotten to know the Morris family. The parents are Salvation Army officers, Divisional Commanders here. They are being transferred to Atlanta in June. We have had a good time together and now we all feel like friends. The two children are enthusiastic, energetic and smart. Before I leave Mississippi, I invited them out to dinner. This is now my official method of entertaining. I like it. No fuss or muss. No cooking or setting the table. Just select a restaurant, arrange a date and meet. And enjoy. Last evening I took Lyft to Ely's, the steak house in Ridgeland I went with Wendy and Ken, Christina and Molly. I thought the 17 year old son Andrew would enjoy a good steak in a fancy steakhouse. Our dinners were delicious, as was the conversation. We talked about Oklahoma University visit for Andrew, and Amanda's exploits as a brass band player. And we talked about the new position for the parents in Atlanta. But the best part was that we all five had lots of fun. And I did not have to do a thing, except pay the bill. It is my new style of entertaining. And I like it.

May 6, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Good News.

Good news is always welcome. Early this morning I had a PET scan. Next I had my vital signs taken and had blood drawn. Lastly. I went to see Dr. Sheehan, my Oncologist. Everything is a case of hurry up and wait. By the time I spoke to Dr. Sheehan, all results were before her. My scan was unchanged from three months ago which means I do not need to take cheno this summer. Good news indeed. And my blood work was normal. Every reading was within normal range, the first time ever. My white cells today were 8.1. When I returned from the Mississippi cruise when I was still on Ibrance my white cells were 2. So now I am healthy. I am quietly pleased. I know that one day the scans will once again not be so good. But for the moment, I am pleased. A friend asked son David about his Mother. He said, "She is great, especially since in the Fall of 2014 she was given 4 to 6 months to live". Modern medicine took over, along with good food, plenty of prayers and healing hugs to pull me through. I am grateful for this bit of good news today.

May 5, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Grandpa Houghton.

The more I thought about Grandpa Houghton the more I realized that I knew little about him. I know he was the father of my mother, Frances Gertrude Emma Houghton Buckley. I know he was born in England on the north side of London and that he was the youngest child in his family. What that meant was that he was never going to inherit land, businesses or money. All the family wealth went to the oldest son. My Grandfather was required to make his way in life on his own. I also know, because my Mother told me, that he was trained as an architect. At that time the architect also oversaw the construction of the building so my Mother always spoke of her father as an architect/builder. My Father liked my Grandfather, which was high praise. Dad said that Grandpa Houghton was a gentleman and interesting. But he died. before I was born, which my Father always said was a shame. He did not think so well of Grandma Houghton because she was a bit of a princess. My Mother also spoke highly of her father. Grandpa Houghton worked in the family business in London but at some point he branched out on his own and went to South Africa to build, leaving the family of five children by themselves in Wales. I have a letter from the Corps Officer from the Corps in Wales being sad they were leaving for Canada. Next in 1911, he moved the whole family to Victoria, B.C. where they lived in a lovely home complete with gardens and household help. By then he was involved in the Salvation Army. Grandpa Houghton was walking to the train to go home when he heard William Booth speaking at a street meeting. He went home and told his wife that they needed to go and listen to this man, who had started The Salvation Army. The next evening they returned and became life long members. Two of their children became Salvation Army officers in Canada. After the children left home, Grandma and Grandpa Houghton became SA Envoys. In other words they were unpaid employees. They went north and taught at an Indian school for several years. Now my brother and I differ. I thought Grandpa Houghton died of colon cancer. Dave said pneumonia. My brother saw Grandpa twice before he died and reported that as a child he was a bit forbidding. Dave thought they went to live with my Aunt in Montreal because he lost his money in the early part of the depression. I recall that they moved to live with Aunt Miriam after he was ill. I have only one cousin who might have information. But that is all I know of my Grandpa Houghton. The most important aspect of him was that according to my Father, he was a kindly Christian Victorian gentleman. He treated his wife gently and lovingly and always sat beside her at the dining table. The last thing he did at the end of the meal was to take a half piece of bread, butter it, and give it to his lovely wife. He loved his wife and family to the end. I wish I had known him.

May 4, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Simple Pleasures.

Last Thursday, my BSF group went out to lunch together. I was sitting beside our group leader. During the conversation, she asked me if I ever started the day feeling grumpy. I said no and the conversation moved on to other things. Later in the day, I wondered why I do not get grumpy. And I decided that when I was a young adult, I learned the value of simple pleasure each day that made me feel good, so I never dwelt on the difficulty of the day. I found that the little things make you feel good each day, not necessarily the big events. Every Wednesday when I came home from teaching, I stopped into a tiny convenience store across the street from the hardware store where we lived. I bought a fresh loaf of rye break for 19 cents. The lady who ran the store was handicapped and sit on a stool behind the counter. She was friendly. The fresh bread only came on Wednesday. As we were poor, the 19 cent expenditure was a big deal. But it was delicious. And that simple pleasure gave me a sense of joy, way above any real value. This morning I ate a slice of multi grain toast covered with creamed cheese, along with raspberries, strawberries and walnuts. The whole plate pleased me, just looking at it for my breakfast. And the cook Dreisys came this morning with my food for the week. She cooks at home, now that she has a new baby so she only stays 15 minutes or so, but it pleases me to see her. I am pleased to have my meals brought to me but the bigger part is the short visit. I have always been able to find some simple event to keep giving me pleasure. This is especially true in the Spring, when the whole world becomes a magical place. Certainly, no need to be grumpy. I just find something simple to give me pleasure. Then all will be well.

May 3, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Lunch With Eleanor.

These young ladies indulge me I know. I invite them one by one to come to have coffee with me at my home. These young ladies are all friends of Christina. By now they are also friends of mine. Every so often I invite them, one by one, to have lunch with me. I select the restaurant and we meet there. I take a Lyft. Then they drive me home. I know they indulge me because they know I am learning to live by myself and I am often lonely. For them, because they all have children at home, they get a break from their heavy responsibilities and chat with me in a lovely restaurant. My system seems to work for both of us. Today I met Eleanor for lunch at Amerigo, a fine Italian restaurant in Ridgeland. We had a good time. And we ate excellent food. Half of my food is in the fridge for tomorrows lunch. Eleanor is a wonderful artist so we always have a conversation about whether or not she is painting. Unfortunately, at the moment, she is not painting but she intends to b get back to it this summer. She home schools the four children so she is a busy lady. I am always urging her to get organized so she can paint. Her middle child is talented artistically and on the piano and has asked her Mother to give her painting lessons. Eleanor this will begin the lessons this summer. Her method of teaching will be to paint alongside her daughter who will also be painting. So Eleanor will paint and describe what she is doing along with helping her daughters painting with suggestions. Eleanor needs to be painting. As her husband Jim mentioned to me, "Eleanor is too fine an artist not to be painting." I agree. Eleanor is a good friend and I enjoy her company. And I especially appreciate her taking the time from her busy days to stop and come for lunch with me. The best gift anyone could give to an old lady is the gift of time. Today I got it from Eleanor and I was grateful.

May 2, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. Stupidity In Action.

I am always surprised when I do something that is just stupid. These things have happened to me all my life, but fortunately not very often. Once I went through a whole day using the wrong date on my calendar. Obviously, I missed several appointment but it took until late in the day until I figured it out. Just stupidity. Years ago I made two appointment for the same time period even though they were both written on my calendar. How could I have done that when I was looking right at the day book? Two appointments at exactly at the same time would be impossible. Fortunately I woke up but had some explaining and rescheduling to do. Last week I did another stupid thing. Fortunately in the middle of the night I figured out what I had done so I retrieved the letter from the postman. No harm was done. Wonderful Wendy filled in the form required to activate my benefits and she sent it into OPM along with the two required copies, the death certificate and our marriage license. It was being processed. But last Thursday I received a letter telling me to fill out the attached form. I thought it was additional information so I filled it out and attached the copies and put on a stamp. And left it for the postman the next day. In the middle of the night I decided that the form was the same so I called OPM to ask. My case was approved and yes, the form was the same so she urged me not to send a duplicate. So I retrieved the letter which now sits ready to put in the file. At the moment it serves as a reminder of my stupidity. Once again, I was kept humble. No one ever tells me about the stupid things they do so perhaps it is just me. I think it is kind of funny and I laugh at myself. But I certainly hope the incidents do not increase. Fortunately, I have done these things every so often over my life. Sometimes I just do not connect the dots. Odd I think.

May 1, 2019. Madison, Mississippi. My Helper.

In honor of my sister's birthday, I ran errands. Carol always had a long list of tasks to accomplish before the day was done, so today I decided to run errands with my helper Kashina. As I have gotten older, I need more help and have had no problem asking for help. But without my helper here at home I would have trouble. Fortunately, Kashina helps me two days a week. I woke up in the middle of the night in a panic. It was the first night after Ken died. Ken had helpers all year but now I would no longer have the helpers. But it downed on my that I could ask Kashina to work for me twice a week. After I figured out that solution, I no longer was anxious. I was not trapped. Today was a perfect example. Kashina drives my car. First we went to the shoe repair man to have a sole glued back in place. Next we drove to Target, where I needed a container to hold Ken's canes plus new pants and shirts for me. The store was mostly empty which made life easier for me. Kashina helped look for objects and a nice young man helped us too. It turned out that he was the big manager but he helped me look for clothes for me. Pretty nice. Next up we went for lunch at Logan's Roadhouse, just across the street from the shopping center. Then I went into Krogers grocery store while Kashina waited in the car. I needed fruit and berries. The shoes were ready so we picked them up. On the way home we stopped for gas. When we got home, Kashina brought the groceries plus all my Target belongings into the house. By then it was almost 4:00 so Kashina left. Our day was successful. For me to accomplish all those tasks myself would have been difficult. It would have been several different Lyft trips. So I was smart to decide to hire Kashina. She has made my life much easier since Ken died. I am not shy in asking help when I am out by myself. I ask to take an arm when the hostess is taking me to a table in the restaurants. Fortunately, I always get the help I need. But Kashina is the biggest help of all. And I am grateful.