November 21, 2008. Bethesda, Md. Children.

It is always difficult when a child dies. It seems so unnatural to have a child pre-decease the parent . It is especially difficult when the child that dies has been a troubled child, who made life difficult for herself along with everyone else who tried to be helpful, including the parents and siblings. You just wonder why. Most answers are unsatisfactory, but still leaves you with more questions than answer. One thing we know now, is that the young woman is at peace.

Nikki was 32 when she died. Carol E. was her Mother. All these years we have known of the pain that comes from a daughter who seems self destructive and who will not look after herself. From time to time she refuses to take her medication and when this happens, bad behavior surfaces and no one is able to help. The other good folks become helpless to assist. It is heartbreaking to watch. All you are left to do is pray, the same as her Mother. This was one of those times when she was refusing to take her medication, even those medicines were provided for her. She was asked to leave the shelter after having a fight with another girl. She stayed overnight with her Brother but was asked to leave after more destructive behavior. When she collapsed in a store she was taken to the hospital where she died immediately. Now she is at peace. The rest of us will wonder what we could have done to be more helpful to her. Certainly the Family will grieve for the passing of Nikki and for the past many years where they tried unsuccessfully to help her. Life is strange, and sometimes out of our control. We at the Bethesda Gateway office with to keep the Family in our thoughts and prayers.