January 7, 2019. Playa Roy7ale, Mexico. A Fine Day.

The highlight of the day was sitting at the end of Paradise Village looking out at the sea and eating our late leisurely lunch. The day was perfect. Sara Lou and I were sitting in the shade enjoying the warm air and the breezes. Ken and I often had lunch in this restaurant, infact it might have been our favorite. Happy memories flooded in. Sara Lou and I actually ate three courses. We sat and ate for a long time and enjoyed every bite and every minute. We had walked from Playa Royale to the Hotel because I was intent in finding out whether or not the Paradise Time Share organization had any program for buying back points. I am trying to decide how much I will use the time share. Our meeting went well and I was able to obtain answers. They have no program but the do have a system that I could pay for insurance which would rebate the annual maintenance fee. I must talk to David. We also walked back home. Tonight was the National Championship for football and I had a frustrating time finding the game on my TV. Finally at half time I found the game on the bedroom TV so we were able to watch Clemson stomp on Alabama. which was a big surprise. Our day was just fine. I was able to get answers, take a walk, eat delicious food plus watch a football game. Pretty nice for a widow.

January 6, 2019. Playa Royale, Mexico. Being a Widow.

Until now, I have paid little attention to widows. Now I realize that I know only two extremes. On the one hand is the widow who never recovers after the death of their spouse. Queen Victoria comes into that category. I have seen present day examples who keep a shrine to the deceased husband in their home and continue to bemoan their lot. We all see them. On the other hand is the widow who gets on with their life ands although missing their husband, start a whole new life and become successful in their own right. My own Mother is the perfect example of this type. She had a full new and successful career after my Father died and she retired from being a Salvation Army Officer. When she died, she was in charge of the order department off a Canadian Publishing company and was successful in her own right. I suspect that most widows come in-between the extremes. One factor is the intangibles. One new bride commented to me that after her wedding, she felt more confident. I agreed with her. Being loved and loving another brings much confidence so perhaps there is a loss of confidence when one becomes a widow. I did observe in my mother an increase of anxiety after my father died. My mother was confident but I detected an increase in anxiety that I never saw before. My Mother was busy and active. She was good at her job and she was active with her social life and her family. But her anxiety increased. And it never left. Maybe I imagined it. We certainly did not talk about anxiety. But I wonder if being alone all the time brings added anxiety. I supposed I will find out.

January 5, 2019. Playa Royale, Mexico. A Simple Excursion.

I am easily entertained. Today Sara Lou and I took an ordinary excursion and turned it into a a major event. We had a lot of fun doing something that was ordinary. What we did was to go to the big grocery store. Sara Lou had read about the Mega grocery store and she wanted to see a big Mexican store so we did. First we took a taxi to the Mega store in Bucerias. Our grocery list was short because we did not really go to the store to buy groceries. We were there to inspect the place. But we did have a list. The first decision we had was to decide whether or not we would each push a cart. The decision was for me to push the cart and SLC would put stuff into the cart. Our goal was to go up and down every isle and we did. The grocery store is wonderful. The produce is fresh and plentiful. Every section is excellent but I like the bakery best of all. The store has many products to buy that are ready to eat. I never buy them because I do not know how to serve most of them. SL was impressed with the place. The most unusual thing today was that the store was not crowded at all. I expected it to be crowded with families. I don't know if Mexican families do not shop on Saturday afternoon but today the store was almost empty which was nice for us because we were just walking slowly up and down. When we had paid for our purchases we took a taxi home to Playa. With a quick trip upstairs with our groceries in a cart, our job was done. For dinner we ate our new food which was chicken, fresh bread and salad. We both congratulated ourselves for our enjoyable excursion which was simple but pleasant. It was our only excursion os the day. For sure, we are easily satisfied.

January 4, 2019. Playa Royale, Mexico. Sara Lou.

Yesterday was a long day for Sara Lou. She flew very early from BWI airport to Chicago where she had a three hour wait for her next flight to Puerto Vallarta. She arrived in time at 1:49 but immigration and customs were jammed with people. And when she tried to get a taxi she had to wait. Whew. Finally she got to Playa Royale at 4:00. So she was tired. We talked and we talked and wed talked. Finally we ate yogurt and nut bread before we both put up our feet. Sara Lou slept until 7:00 then she prepared the pasta Rosa had given me the day before. We ate the delicious dinner at 9:30. And we talked some more. The pasta was delicious even though we had no salad or bread. Sara Lou and I have been friends for ages. We have travelled together so I am delighted she has come to join me in Mexico. She is good company. On a low note, this afternoon Murmie phoned to tell SL that Marilyn Teilembaum had passed away which made Sara Lou sad. Marilyn was an old Snider Bros. agent and had worked closely with SL for years. Sara Lou feels badly not to be there to help with the family. But she is here with me in Mexico. This afternoon we sat by the pool. I swam while Sara Lou read. Riviera Grill for dinner. We are having a good time. I am pleased she is here.

January 3, 2019. Playa Royale, Mexico. Sunsets.

Every sunset is different and every evening I am amazed. This evening I sat waiting for the sun to set but the sky was gray and black. All I could see was white, black and gray. The sun was nowhere in sight. To the right of where I sat on the balcony I could see white. I thought the sunset would be a bust so I came inside. Sara Lou was organizing her belongings. A few minutes later I looked out and the sky was ablaze with orange. On the right I could see aquamarine sky. And bright blue. The sun had set but the reflection on the clouds was dramatic and the sky was magnificent. Ten minutes later, the color was gone. A few nights ago when I was by myself I sat waiting for the sunset. Everything Wass black or white. No sun anywhere. Then a hole appeared through the black clouds and let through sunshine. The water directly in front of the sun turned blood red. It was amazing. The clouds were still dark black but the water on the horizon was bright red. I had to blink to make sure I was not making it up. The red water continued for a few minutes. Then everything was dark again. The sunset was not spectacular but it certainly was unusual. Rita took a picture of every sunset we saw from our balcony. Ian teased her about all the sunsets. But she was not deterred. She knew that every sunset was different and every sunset is beautiful. Each evening I am again amazed.

January 2, 2019. Playa Royale, Mexico. Rosa and Nico.

The story can be repeated many times. Italian immigrants move to Canada to start a new life. They work hard and save their money and they get rich. Then they spend their winter months in Mexico. End of story. Except the story is complicated. Rosa's father and two older brothers moved to Toronto in 1953. The three saved their money and bought a house. In 1955 Rosa, who was 14, moved to Canada with her Mother and older sister. The girls went to school, speaking no English. They soon learned and thrived. Nico, Rosas husband was born in 1936 and had emigrated to Canada in 1955 too. He went to work in construction. Rosa and Nico married in 1960 and proceeded to have 5 children. Their pattern never changed. They lived a frugal life and saved their money. When they had enough money, they bought a piece of land, always on the outskirts o0f town and well beyond the major population. The first piece of land Nico bought was the first house he built on his own. They family lived in it from then on. The next land he bought he built two houses and sold them, always buying more land beyond the major population. His pattern never changed. Fortunately for them, the population moved north so they prospered. Now they are rich. Their five children have done well as does the 14 grandchildren., It is a wonderful immigrant story of hard work and thrift. But that is only part of the story. Today Rosa told me that 20 years ago Nico bought himself a house just down the street. Rosa said there was some lady problems so she insisted he move out. They are still married. They still eat dinner together every night, of course cooked by Rosa. They live in the same condo in our complex in separate bedrooms. When you see them together there are no signs of estrangement. Rosa told me that they attend functions together and never tell people they live in separate homes. "That is none of their business<" she said. I was amazed. I have known them for 15 years or more. And today I hear the rest of the story. People are fascinating.

January 1, 2019. Playa Royale, Mexico. Rosa.

Rosa has invited me to join her at her palapa and I am not even Italian. She phoned me after she received my card saying that Ken had passed away so she inviters me to join here so I would not sit by myself by the pool. She is a lovely lady. Last year she three times brought food she had cooked over to us just to be helpful. Rosa is as a little old Italian lady who cooks three meals a day for her husband and to everyone else who is visiting her. Her husband will not eat out and she likes to cook. Last year, several family members were at Playa to celebrate her husbands. birthday. They wanted to take them out to celebrate. He refused. "The food is better at home," he said. End of story. Rosa and I bonded many years ago. I was reading by the pool and she was practicing her swimming. Over the summer, Rosa took swimming lessons at the Y to impress her grandchildren. They teased her because she could not swim. They were coming and she was practicing. She was hopeless so I asked her if she wanted some help. I taught lots of swimming over the years. I tried and she tried but she never got any better. But she introduced me as her swimming teacher to her friends and family. Her grand children were impressed which was the only thing she wanted. I have never seen her in the water since even though I invite her in when I swim. She is terrified. She always sits at the same palapa. The developer of our complex was Italian and many of the early purchasers were from the Canadian Italian group. They had all emigrated to Canada at the same time. Many Italians owners sit with Rosa by the pool. The men play cards and shuffleboard and never sit with the ladies. I love the family story but will not discuss it tonight. It is an American dream except they are Canadians who live in Toronto. I am now an honorary member of Rosa's palapa. I feel honored.