May 5, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Helpers.

Since returning from Mexico we have had a helper in the home all day and all night. During the day time, the helpers are young women who alternate, with one week Kendria working 4 days in a row and text week 3. I have been interested to note the differences. Theoretically, their task is the same, which is to help Ken to do anything he needs. At first, Ken needed help for everything so when Ken needed to move from one place to another, they walked behind him holding his arms. And he needed to have help getting up from a chair. Bit by bit, Ken has been getting stronger and more independent. Today he showered totally on his own so progress has been made. April helps Ken to get things done such as fill the bird feeders and install grippers under chair legs. Kendria is uncomfortable doing those tasks. When Ken opens boxes, April breaks down the boxes and takes the flat cardboard into the recycle bin. Kendria takes the boxes to the garage if asked. Their difference approach to their job is interesting to me. Kendria will do anything you ask her to do and do it cheerfully but she does not initiate activities except for helping Ken. The three ladies who work at night had a hard task in the early weeks. Ken needed help going to the bathroom every time. And he often did not sleep week so walked around the house at any hours which of course made them anxious. These ladies are not young but they are pleasant and kindly and pay attention to Ken. We have enjoyed getting to know all five of our helpers. Now Ken is doing better and is more independent. Ken and I have suggested to each other that we do not need the night shift helpers. They work 12 hours, from 7 to 7. For the last three nights, he has not needed help. He puts on his own night shirt. They make sure he has his night medication and that he has 2 glasses of juice by his bed and make sure he has his 6:00 am meds. But we are anxious. Ken has been without another infection but we are apprehensive about the future. We are having difficulty figuring out when to cut the cord with the helpers. I feel sure that the right way will show itself but it is not apparent at the moment. We have done well with the helpers so now we must make a decision. But not tonight.