November 30, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. My List.

Christmas is coming and my list is long. We go to Mexico and my list is long. If I am not careful I become anxious. Last evening Ken just told me he was feeling good and he asked about me. So I told him about my long list and my anxiety, which made him not feel so good. I should keep my issues to myself. Today I made progress with my list. Today, Keshina dropped me off at the Dollar Store so I could shop to fill the bags for the grandchildren. Next, back home, I filled small bags for the Texas family. And we took the five bags to the PacMail store. I love that place. They package up the items to ship, all in a safe and secure way. Then they send the box via a courier. On Wednesday we took camera equipment to them to be shipped to Samantha. Ken no longer is able to use his fancy cameras and lens so we sent everything to Samantha, who it turns out is a wonderful photographer. The PacMail protected the objects where I would have trouble. No fuss or muss. They measure and weigh the object. I pay them, and I leave. The whole thing takes 5 minutes of my time. Wonderful service. Actually, it might be called MailPac. Every time I use their services I feel I should hug their neck. Now I must organize the Mississippi family bags. But I discovered today that I have nothing to give to Christina or Molly. Oops. My list just got longer. Today I made an appointment for Ken to have his hair cut and beard trimmed. And I again texted Adrianna in Mexico who is our contact to get helpers for us. And I need to ask her to find us a bed rail. My list includes refilling our medications for our 6 weeks in Mexico. And I must organize our clothes. We have clothes in our locker at the condo but I have no idea what we left for Ken. We do not wish to check baggage so we must pack light, using only our small carry on bags, which in Ken's bag is half full of medicines. I must confirm the number for our party on December 8 and take a cheque to the yacht club. So I am making progress. And the next time I will keep my list to myself. I overwhelmed Ken which serves no purpose. I am feeling better about my list.

November 29, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. BSF.

I have rejoined BSF. I have not attended for a year or so but I decided that I needed more activities in my life. Linda Creath has been keen to have me come back and has agreed to bring me home. Actually, I only attended for a few Thursdays. First I had no one to drive me and next my cancer returned so my immune system was shot. Now my white cells are 7 so I am safe to get out into the world. Kashina drove me this morning and Linda brought me home. So the system will work. BSF stands for Bible Study Fellowship. It is a national organization. Changes were made with their routine so now we go straight to our own group upon arrival. Then we meet in the auditorium to sing a hymn and listen to a talk. The course of study is set by the main office and lessons are given out each week. It is all well organized. My group is interesting too. The leader is Dana, and we are 10 ladies in the group. Even though we are studying the Bible, we learn a lot about the ladies during our time together. The age group is 50 to 80. One member of our group id a bible scholar, which pleases me because a bible scholar I am not. But I will learn, which is the whole point. One lady will be going to Las Vegas this weekend. Her niece is competing to become Miss Rodeo Queen of America. She already is Miss. Rodeo Queen for Mississippi. Who knew? You learn attending bible study!!

November 28, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. November 11, 1946.

On November 11, 1946, my father wrote in my autograph book. Someone must have given me one and I had everyone I knew write a note. I continued the practice for several years. Then I quit. Autograph books went out of fashion. At some point, I threw it out but I removed the sheet my father wrote along with one written by a Colonel Grinstead when he visited us in Vancouver. My fathers hand writing was terrible, which is part of the charm. Also he forgot one line of the poem so was forced to tuck the missing line squeezed between two others. I have no idea where the poem comes from but I think it is charming. A few months ago I came upon the paper in my old writing case and decided to bring it out to the light of day. Today we picked up the poem framed. Now it will be hung just beside the door to our powder room so everyone who visits us would get to see it. Except my fathers writing is a scrawl and not easy to read. Here is what he wrote to me: Darling Ruth:- 11/7/46 Do good sweet maid and let who will be clever. Do noble deeds don't dream them all day long. And so - make life & the vast forever one glad sweet song. Daddy. I wonder what my father would have thought about my life? Unfortunately he died before any success we had. Now I am thrilled to have his message to me on my wall. And I hope the grandchildren will see it too. Nifty.

November 27, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Changes.

We were too slow to change our routines. The first time Ken rolled out of the bed we should have installed a railing for the bed. What were we thinking? Three times it took plus one serious fall from the chair before we changed our patterns. Now the rail has worked and Ken has not fallen out of the bed since. The question we ask is why did he all of a sudden start rolling out of bed and end on the floor? One reason may be that his Parkinson's disease has gotten worse. Or perhaps the new diuretic he has been taking recently caused him to loose his sense of space. His feet and legs were swollen so our doctor prescribed an additional medication, which has worked. But he rolled out of bed. Today we went to an evaluation of swallowing at the University. The facilities and staff at the University Hospital are remarkable and extensive. This morning we met with a speech therapist who is also an expert in swallowing. She had Ken swallow water. And she watched and held his throat. And she watched him swallow chocolate pudding. Her suggestion to Ken was to slow everything down. Every time he takes a sip on the straw, he is supposed to wait. Then take another sip. His pattern has always to take three or four sips on the straw. Fortunately, he aspirated some water in the middle of the test, which was good. She wants him to have an X-ray of his swallowing so we have an appointment on Dec. 17. One appointment always means another appointment will need to be done. Ken commented to the young lady that he would take all day just eating and drinking. Most of Ken's patterns are fine. He already eats slowly and often eats at the table alone while I sit in the living room adjacent to the breakfast room. So once again, Ken must make changes. Our helpers are changing too. Mary Brown will stay with us from 9 to 9 on four nights and Kashina will stay the other three nights. Their task is to be sure that Ken does not fall. Ken has a good sleep last night and so did I. Our patterns have changed once again. We should have made changes earlier I guess. But here we go.

November 26, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Night Helper.

Ken has fallen four times in the last ten days. Falling is the most common problem with Parkinson's patients but Ken has only fallen twice since he was first diagnosed in the Fall of 2014. Something odd has happened. Now he sleeps with a bed rail. On the Saturday afternoon after his fall, I asked Ken is he thought we needed a night helper, but he said no. By Sunday afternoon he changed his mind. He is fearful of falling and so am I so I called Cindie who owns the company to see if the could find night helpers for us. And she did. Gladys came to work last night and I asked her to sit in the TV room while we slept so she could assist Ken getting up and down. But Ken had a terrible night. He barely slept. He hated having someone watching him as he was going asleep so he has asked me not to have the night sitter watch him from the TV room. Gladys, who was here last night, will not be coming back. In her place tonight is Mary Brown, who I like a lot. And Kashina will work three nights too. We hope we will keep Ken safe. Ken and Kashina thing that Ken will recover quickly from his fall and that soon we will not need a night helper. We will see. In the meantime, I hope to be able to sleep myself. Last night I woke up whenever Ken got up which was about every hour. At the moment, the night sitter will work from 9 to 9. Kashina works from 9 to 4. We should be OK. Ken looks a wreck. His eye is black and swollen and he has an abrasion on his forehead. He hurts all over. We just might take our Christmas card picture right now. The worst part of the falls have been his confidence. And he is weak. But next week we go for an evaluation with a physical therapist. We hope they will take him on as a client. Tomorrow he goes to a therapy to help him with swallowing. He is trying to get better. Ken hopes our night helper will be temporary. But we will see. In the meantime, I hope tonight we both get a decent night sleep, with the help of Mary.

November 25, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. 11 Years Old.

Fine And Dandy was the restaurant selected by Molly to celebrate her 11th birthday. Ken was not able to attend the celebration but we brought food home for both Ken and Kashina so they were not totally left out. The restaurant serves hamburgers but it is a long way from being a burger joint. It is fancy. And Molly likes it, especially the milkshakes which are spectacular. So we celebrated in style. When Kate was 11, Ken and I gave her a shopping spree. Molly remembers hearing about that first shopping trip for Kate at age 11, so when she opened her gift bag from us and discovered the card included a shopping trip she was thrilled. Last Christmas, she accompanied us when we shopped with Kate and Mary Frances and she liked the whole thing so now next Saturday Christina, Molly and I will go shopping at the Renaissance. She already knows what stores we should go to. And she is going through her wardrobe to see what she will want to try on. For the past two years we have done will with our purchases for Kate and Mary Frances with their Christmas shopping because of the sales. There will be no big sales just before Christmas. But we will enjoy ourselves. Kashina will come on Saturday to stay with Ken while we go out and have fun. Molly like all other tall people is tall for 11 years old. She is my height so fitting her will not be easy. She must shop in teenager stores because the children clothes do not fit and often the teen clothes are not appropriate. She has good taste as does Christina so I feel sure she will end up being pleased with her selections. We will then celebrate by going out for lunch. Saturday December the 1st will be the day. She can't wait. Being 11 is exciting.

November 24, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Quite a Night.

At the Hospital of University of Mississippi Emergency room, a person must go through security. The gentlemen inspect your purse. All your pockets must be put into a bin to be checked for metal and you walk through a screening, just as you do at the airport. Interesting. Ken was taken on the stretcher directly into the emergency, but before I could see him, I had to go through security. Our night began well. Both of us were sound asleep but Ken rolled out of bed and ended up on the floor. We took 90 minutes to get him up. He decided to rest in his recliner. We both went back to sleep around 3:00. I awoke to hear a crash. Ken had forgotten where he was and fell right out of his chair. This was a more serious fall as he was bleeding all over the floor. I called 911. The firemen came first and tended to his scrapes and cuts. But he had hit his head so we all agreed that Ken needed to be checked at the hospital. The ambulance picked us up and carefully took us to the University Hospital, which turned out to be a good choice. As several of our doctors are at the University, all Kens records are in the computer so I did not need to give any information about anything. They needed no cards now lists of medications. The young doctors were efficient and pleasant. Ken had blood drawn, another chest X-ray, and a ct scan. And they dressed his scrapes. The tests were all negative. We were home by 1:30. Clever Christina found, delivered and installed a side rail for the bed. Now we must figure out how Ken will get in and out of the bed. This was a difficult night. But it could have been worse.

November 23, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Christmas Decorations.

In my opinion, the day after Thanksgiving is the best time to decorate the house for Christmas. Once upon a time, the task took a long time but today, I was done in one hour. When we bought our condo in Mississippi, I brought just enough decorations to make the place look like Christmas, but as our place was small, our decorations were few in number. All the rest of the Christmas goodies were divided between the Texas and Mississippi families. Even though we have space here in our home, I am still using the two small boxes of Christmas things. So it takes me all of an hour to place the precious objects in place. On the chest by the front door I put two reindeers with red noses. They are made of red velvet with white antlers. I bought them in Galveston, right after Christmas of 1964, when a nice store in downtown Galveston put their deco0rations on sale. We took no decorations from Toronto to Galveston, so that year, our first in Texas, we had no decorations at all. The red reindeer are the bit the worse for wear but I love them. On the mantle sets my Mother's little houses. I have no idea where she got them but I have them now. Mother set them on white cotton but I got rid of that and now they look charming. And they remind me of my wonderful Mother. I fill a big bowl which sets on the coffee table with pine cones that I have gathered over the years. I have cones from Yosemite and Nova Scotia. Ken has always laughed about me gather pine cones all over North America, but I enjoy them now. Natalie and Harvey, many years ago, gave me a Tiffany Christmas box, which I keep on the shelves by the front door. My decorations are sparse but they make our home look like Christmas. Every object has history which pleases me when each piece is put in place. Now we are ready for the Christmas season. My decorating is complete.

November 22, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Thanksgiving.

There is no better holiday than Thanksgiving. The menu is set so no decisions must be made. Families gather together in someones home to visit, eat and watch football. Nothing separates one group from another. Everyone joins together to gives thanks, both the Catholics and the Protestants, Jews and Muslim. Everyone does the same thing and eats the same food. No pressure. No anxiety. Just gather and enjoy. My day started with the Macy's parade followed by the dog show. Such fun. Our celebration was splendid. The girls were lively and pleased to be celebrating Thanksgiving together. The food was excellent. The girls all helped with preparations and Christina carved the turkey. And when everyone left to go home, the kitchen was clean and dishwasher loaded. All I needed to do was to start the dishwasher, then put away the dishes. Christina and the girls are thoughtful indeed. Linda especially enjoyed the white pelicans. They came right in front of our dock, so everyone enjoyed watching them so close. Mary Frances and Molly went outdoors to get closer but of course, as soon as the girls went toward the dock the birds paddled away. We certainly have much to give thanks, most importantly being our family. I chatted at length with son David this afternoon. They celebrated together at home with both University students home for Thanksgiving. Tomorrow they will go to the lake for the weekend. They might even water ski. One of the pleasures of Thanksgiving is the left over turkey. For supper tonight Ken and I ate a turkey sandwich. Delicious. I do love Thanksgiving.

November 21, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Cooking A Turkey.

Cooking a turkey is easy. I have done it many times. But this year, I am preparing the turkey the easiest possible way. And the interesting thing is that the dinner tastes the same as if I had started from scratch. This morning, Keshena drove me to Primos to pick up our feast. The experience was wonderful. My refrigerator is full of containers and all I need to do is heat them up. Such a pleasure. I did the same thing several years ago and much to Ken's surprise, the turkey was not dry. Christina and I ate breakfast at Primos a few weeks ago and I ordered our feast. Today we just needed to pick up the food and store it in the fridge. Tomorrow all I must do is turn on the oven. Primos is an institution in Jackson. I have always been impressed with their food and their efficiency. Today they were on top of their game. They were staffed up. When we first walked in they had people checking up into the computer. Immediately you went to the cashier to pay your bill. Next you went to the end of the counter where a young man brought all the food from the kitchen and carried the food to the car. The place was full of people but I was only in the restaurant for five minutes. It was wonderful to behold. Both staff and customers were enthusiastic and joyful. After all, the customers did not need to cook. Many folks were doing exactly what I was doing which was to buy the whole meal, but many others were picking up dessert or rolls. Primos covered themselves with glory today. They were efficient and pleasant and enthusiastic. Hats off to them. I always enjoy a business that anticipates the needs of the customers and sets their systems up so the routines will be smooth. No waiting. No hassle. Just superb service. Now I must b my part and not overheat the food. It could happen.

November 20, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Shopping.

I enjoy shopping for Christmas gifts. But I always do my buying a long time before the Christmas season. All through the year I would buy gifts and store them in the attic. When the time comes for me to wrap, all I had to do was tp pull the bags and boxes and sort them into piles. I hated the pressure of specifically going to buy a gift. So I planned ahead, thus making my Christmas season delightful. Now I order from catalogues and have things delivered. Soon I must mail items that can not be sent to Canada. And I have special gifts for the grandchildren that must be mailed too. So the season has begun to try to keep ahead of the required task. Kashina told me all about Walmart sales. It sounds like a horror story to me but she and her sisters love it. Black Friday is the big day. At 6:00 pm on Thanksgiving Day, Walmart opens their Black Friday sales. She tells me that people begin lining up mid afternoon, waiting for the doors to open. Kashina said they go every year. "It is so much fun," she said. People are friendly and everyone has a good time. Evidently it is like a big party. And the sales are worth the wait too. She reported a 54 inch television which normally cost $500. will be on sale on Black Friday for $250. No wonder people wait in line. I am afraid I would rather do without. A friend of mine in Bethesda has always done all his Christmas shopping on Christmas Eve. To me, it sounded just awful but he has always shopped that way. He said it is a perfect time to shop because by the afternoon, no one is in the stores so the service is great. My comment to him about the availability of sizes was countered by telling me that it does not matter about size. "The object can always be returned," says he. That shopping style would not work for me. I like to plan ahead. In just a few days I will be done. Then I will enjoy the season.

November 19, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. During The Night.

Living at our house these days during the night is very like attending a three ring circus. Something is always happening. When I was younger, I assumed that we would have long periods of slumber, when we could sleep in as long as we wanted. In real life at age over 80, both Ken and I have not experienced anything close to that scenario. Having a sense of humor is definitely an asset. Ken does not sleep well so he often wanders around the house in the middle of the night. He sits on the side of the bed eating little chocolates and drinking protein drinks. He often sticks a leg out when sleeping perhaps to keep cool. But the other night he had both legs sticking out. When he rolled over to turn on his light preparing to go to the bathroom, he rolled right off the bed. Of course, I woke up to find him kneeling beside the bed, looking like he was saying his prayers. Actually, he was probably asking God to please help him back in bed. For Ken to get up from a chair is not easy but Ken getting up from the floor was almost impossible. But with my help pushing and pulling, we got him off the floor. After his visit to the bathroom, he went back to sleep immediately. I of course was wide awake. Just the night before while getting out of bed in the middle of the night, Ken slipped and fell back onto the bed. Except he went crooked and ended up half on the bed and half wedged between the bedside table and the bed. I heard the crash so came immediately to Ken's side, omitting to turn on my lamp. Ken's side was pitch dark and Ken was covering his light switch. All the while I could hear gurgling out of a bottle dripping on the floor. Ken was stuck but we managed to get him up so he could get to the bathroom. The protein drink had tipped over on his side table and dripped all over the floor so I had a mess to clean up. But Ken did not harm himself but he does have a bad bruise on his upper arm where he hit the table. At night, Ken and I seem to coordinate our trips to the bathroom. We laugh at each other when passing in the room. Our night times are lively. Never a dull moment. Some nights it seems as if we live in the middle of a circus. It is never dull and quiet, unfortunately. Maybe tonight will be the night when only slumber reigns supreme. That would be a treat.

November 18, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Gift of Time.

No gift is better for old people than the gift of time. Every Sunday, our Mississippi family comes out for lunch with Ken and me. The time they spend with us is a great gift for us. We all enjoy the food but the most important thing is that we get to catch up on all their activities of the past week. I feel sure that they have many other things they could be doing on Sunday at noon, but they indulge us by coming for lunch. Every week I am impressed with their consideration of us. We of course indulge them by having them select the restaurant. And if they select a seafood restaurant we always order oysters on the half shell as an appetizer. Last Sunday we ate at Dragos, a New Orleans style seafood restaurant. First off, we ordered two dozen oysters. Ken ate ten all by himself. Today, both Kate and Molly had colds so we missed them but we enjoyed our time with Mary Frances and Christina. Mary Frances is enjoying her first semester of College so we get to shard in her endeavors. Mary Frances had selected P.I. Change, a good Cinese restaurant in the Renaissance. The fountains surrounding the place are lovely. We had not been there for several years so we were pleased to enjoy the food. Our helper, Keshina, dines with us but has limited choices in food. But she is good natured about the odd food we like. And we just laugh. Ken and I are grateful for our Mississippi family by coming for lunch with us every Sunday. They come from church as everyone is dressed up, so Ken and I do the same. This Sunday lunch is the top of our social life each week. And now with Thanksgiving coming this week we will be together again at our own house. I wonder how much they appreciate the time they spend with us? I must tell them...again and again.

November 17, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Meals.

Our cook, Dreisys, had a baby the end of July. She is not working but is looking after Jack. Instead of cooking at our place, she cooks for us at her home. And she brings the food to us. Sometimes she brings the baby. She cooks on Thursdays. This week she arrived at 7:45 which meant she was up very early as the food was warm when she arrived. Her husband was leaving late for work so she left the baby home. Today for our main meal at noon we ate a delicious beef stew and we have enough left over for two more meals. Our system works well. We enjoy her cooking and she enjoys the extra income. She always makes a large pot of soup. This week is vegetable soup. Last week was lentil. Always delicious and always enough for several meals. I organize the food. Some times I also prepare a meal. This evening for supper we ate in the TV room while we watched the Predators hockey game. In the middle of eating, Ken asked me innocently if I was having difficulty with color blindness in addition to my other problems. I said no. I am fine. Then Ken asked me if the bread in his sandwich started out black. Then I knew what he meant. And I laughed and told him the bread was brown. I fixed Ken a toasted cheese sandwich, which I cooked on a griddle. But I forgot about it and by the time I turned it over, one side was black. The other side was fine so I put the sandwich on the plate with the light brown side up. But he noticed. He said it did not taste burned but he did note that the bread was definitely black, which it was. He knows not to complain but he did wonder. Next time I will pay more attention.

November 16, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Simple Pleasures.

Our Christmas lights are on and glowing. They come on at five and turn off at midnight. Every time I look at them I am pleased. Ken always put up the Christmas lights. He loved lots of lights.. But since he is unable to install them, we went without lights. Every time Ken noticed no lights outside, he felt bad. Last year in a conversation with out outdoor lighting man, I asked him about Christmas lights. He just laughed. He has a whole separate company just putting up holiday lights. He uses his own lights and uses white lights. His installations are gracious. He takes them down right after the new year. And he stores them. Our lights were installed last week. And we love seeing them. So we keep them plugged in. Christina will plug hers in the day after Thanksgiving. But we are enjoying them now. Yesterday a flock of white pelicans arrived in your reservoir. They are giving us great pleasure. For two weeks this Spring they stayed here. Then they disappeared for parts north., Now they are back. This afternoon they were right in front of your dock. We have never seen them so close. We have thirty birds in the flock. In the Spring, they stayed in the center of the lake. Even from that distance they looked big, but right in front of the house they looked enormous. These are huge birds. They were busily floating around eating their meal. It is exciting seeing them so close to shore. Now we wonder how long they will stay. We will watch carefully. They are bringing us great pleasure. This week, Ken and Kashina filled the bird feeders, so we can watch the little birds from the windows. Now they must be refilled. So many birds, all so little. We love watching them from our TV room windows. Simple, but pleasurable.

November 15, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Voices.

When you look at an 81 year old, their look would be very different than a picture of the same person at 18. But if you hear the same person on the phone, their voice would be exactly the same. This past few days I have spoken to three old friends. I instantly recognized their voices even though I had not spoken to them for ages. They also recognized my voice too. It is interesting that everything else changes as we get old, except for our voice. Carol E. called me from work. I had worked with her for 24 years and I miss her spirit but when she called me in the middle of the day I was thrilled. She took the time to call just to say hello. Her voice sounded just the same as ever, at least when I got over the surprise. At first I could not figure out why Carol would call. After all, my sister Carol, who called me regularly, has died. Eventually I figured it out and I was delighted to hear the voice of Carol E. Today I chatted with Denise who I also had worked with for 24 years. I call her and we had a good old chat. She instantly recognized my voice as I did of hers. Nothing has changed in her voice. She sounds just as enthusiastic as ever. I enjoyed that conversation too especially as her Mother also has Parkinson's disease so we shared experiences. And lastly, I had a good old gab fest this evening with my friend Sara Lou. Her voice has not changed a bit in all the years that I have know her, which is a long time. We caught up on our grandchildren and our activities. The best part is that we just pick up where we left off, even though it might have been six months ago. Voices stay the same. These days we text or e mail more than we speak on the phone. But I have enjoyed hearing the voices of my friends. Such a pleasure to hear the same voices.

November 14, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Confidence.

The commentator during a hockey game tonight mentioned that the goalie was an excellent goalie...when he feels confident. I was trying to figure out the difference in the goalie between excellent play and mediocre play and does the goalie know the difference. I have never understood what confidence actually is. Is it mental, between your ears or is it physiology, in the muscles. It is one of those terms that everyone knows is important in accomplishing a task, but where is the confidence come from. And why sometimes confidence just disappears. You see it all the time in sports. "He has lost his confidence," said the commentator about a good golfer. We are speaking about elite players who practice every day and have won multiple tournaments. And then the confidence disappears. The concept is simple but complicated. It is one of those things that you recognize in a person when they feel confident and you know exactly when the confidence has gone. Tonight, I watched a few minutes of ice skating competition. One skater did poorly. A commentator mentioned it before the competition and sure enough. The skater fell. Her confidence had disappeared. Confidence is important in life. But the step to becoming arrogant is small. In the field of athletics, confidence is important. It is fun to watch a whole team become confident, then continue to play better. It is a puzzle, certainly not something that can be turned on and off like a spigot. I have heard the concept all my life but I have no idea what it comes from. But I know when I see it.

November 13, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Pitter Patter.

Whenever I sit in my chair in the corner of the living room and everything in the house is quiet, I could hear the pitter patter of little feet. I could recognize those little feet in the attic because years ago in Nova Scotia I heard the same sounds. I called the exterminator. He left bait in the attic and assured me the problem was solved. But he was wrong. So he came back again. He was not able to find where the little critters were getting into the attic so I knew I would hear them again. And I did. I did what I always do when we have a problem at our home which is to call Chantes. The chimney for the fireplace was also dripping water. The problem was not severe as we only get a bit of dropping, and it only occurs in severe rain and wind. But I do not like having water dripping into the fireplace. Chantes came yesterday to evaluate the situation. A vent in the attic was broken and the screen had come off. He assured me he would fix it. As it was raining yesterday, he was unable to get onto the roof to check the chimney. He told me he would be here Tuesday and he did. He spent an hour or so and repaired the vent and put new better wire over the opening. He seems confident that I should not hear any little foot steps from the attic. He did remind me that we have two vents, which he did not check because it is in a difficult part of another attic at the far side of the house. So far, my room has been quiet and still. No one else is here and there is no noisy wind to cover up the little steps. I am hoping our problem with the pitter patter of little feet is over. What would I do without Chantes?

November 12, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. A Day.

First thing I did today was to eat humble pie. Ken sent me an article giving the reasons why educators are using coloring as a method for developing cognitive thinking. Evidently a part of the brain develops better when coloring. And children and adults relax while coloring, which is why adult coloring books are best sellers. So today I sent the article to Christina. The next time I see Molly I must apologize for demeaning coloring. I am merely being old fashioned. Next up on my activities was to accompany Ken to have more skin removed from yet another cancer. To reward ourselves, we ate lunch at Anjou, a wonderful French restaurant. Fortunately I remembered a gift certificate, which expires next month. Then I booked our flights to Mexico. We will stay over in Dallas both ways so we do not wish to take two flights a day. So we are set to leave December 21 and arrive in Puerto Vallarta the next day. We leave February 2, arriving in Jackson on the 3rd. David and Suzanne and the girls arrive on the 26th. Any one who wishes some time in the 80 degrees of Mexico would be welcome from December 31 to January 12. We would welcome your visit to stay in our guest room. Next task for me tomorrow will be to find a helper in Nuevo Vallarta. And perhaps a cook for several days a week. But not today. My day is done.

November 11, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Coloring.

On Friday at Grandparents' Day, I opened my mouth and inserted my foot. I should have known better but I was so surprised at what I was seeing that I spoke out loud. Fortunately the teacher was not near me. Molly is in 5th grade. Her teacher is Mrs. Brown. They are just completing a section on the First World War. Clearly the teacher has done a good job. Molly knows a lot about the war, even to the major players on both sides of the battle. The students made a model of a deep ditches the soldiers stayed in order to not be shot. The walls in the classroom are covered with other projects made by students. Molly took me to her desk, which was small. On the desk was a three ring binder of the First World War in which Molly showed me the pages she had written about. And she showed me pictures of people, who she named. She described the different soldiers and the officers and the generals. I was impressed. I asked how she got the pictures. She told me she colored them all. Page after page, I looked at these drawings and was appalled that in the 5th grade Molly was coloring. That was what I said. Just then, Linda came over and asked what I had said. She disagreed with me. She thought the pages in Molly's books were beautiful and reinforced everything Molly had been taught in class. My position is that coloring is mindless. A piece of paper given to a child to color means that the teacher has nothing else for them to do. When young, children are helped by controlling their fingers but that is all it does. At lunch today, Christina also defended the practice. Mary Frances said that when she paints, first she draws. Then she colors in the shape. I must ask more people . Perhaps I am out of date. Mrs. Brown clearly brought the war home to the students and they learned a lot so I may be wrong about coloring. I even read last year that adults can now purchase coloring books. I was horrified. Perhaps if I had been better at coloring within the lines I would have had better handwriting. I never mastered the art which is perhaps I think coloring is ridiculous. Next time I will keep my mouth closed and only tell Molly how wonderful those pages were. Or maybe not.

November 10, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Retiring.

Once upon a time, we just called her Wendy. Now we all call her Wonderful Wendy. Just like speaking of Mary Frances was one name, Wendy's proper name is Wonderful Wendy. Years ago in 1972, Wendy spent a week with us the week we moved into our first home. The boys were 3 and 4 so we had limited time to unpack and organize but we got it done. At the end of the week, Dave and Irene drove from Ontario to have a visit and bring us our china and the one painting we owned. Wendy has been helping us ever since. But she had not yet received her new name. She flew to the farm for a week when we were organizing to sort stuff and have our belonging put into storage. At that time she was even more helpful because Rita was forced to go to the hospital in Cumberland and Wendy spoke to the insurance company. Rita was in great pain, Ian was driving without his hearing aids, so Wendy stepped up to the plate. But she got her new name when she came to unpack our boxes in our new house. From the time she walked in on Thursday evening until she left ten days later Wendy worked. When she left, all boxes had been opened and belongings organized. I have called her Wonderful Wendy ever since. Now she has sprung out in a fresh direction. She is retiring at the end of this month. The company she works for is having yet another merger. She was given the opportunity to apply for a new position or to take a retirement package. It took her a nanosecond to decide. She will retire. And she is excited. I am excited for her but I was surprised. She just made the decision on Wednesday. In true Wendy fashion, my e mail said "I am retiring the end of this month". No warning. Just done. Ken and Anne are planning to retire at the end of 2019. We have talked at length of their plans. We think it is fitting for Wendy to retire before Kenny. After all, she is older. But what about older brother Norman? Congratulations to Wendy. As an added bonus to us, Wendy and friend Ken will visit us in Mexico for three weeks. This will be their first trip during retirement. I bet it will not be their last. Hats off to Wendy.

November 9, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Grandparents' Day.

Molly loves it when both her grandmothers come to Grandparents' Day. It is a special day for her. And I like it too. Her school holds it every year. I have attended three. It is a well attended event with almost 1000 grandparents in attendance. The program is sweet and well organized. Each grade sings a song or two, some religious and some secular. The program is well organized and moves along well. When you first arrived, we are assigned a table of eight, all with other grandparents in the same class as Molly. The eighth graders serve us coffee while we wait. After the program, which lasts 45 minutes, the child comes to the table to escort us to meet her teacher and see the classrooms. Next Linda, Molly and I go out for lunch. The whole morning is a delight. Of course, it helps that the teachers say wonderful things about Molly. We can be proud of our Molly. But I can not stop myself making suggestions if only in my mind. Christ Covenant is a lovely school with a strong mission to partner with parents and grandparents to teach and train the child academically and spiritually. They do a great job but today, all the emphases was on the spiritual, not the academic. I would have liked to hear something about their academic standards. The program is pleasant but the format is the same every year. Absolutely nothing is changed except the songs sung by the children. The format has not varied at all from beginning to end. I understand the success of the day. People love to see their grandchild on stage and clearly the grandparents love it and come every year. I would like to see something new, just to keep me interested. Christ Covenant is a small school, K to 8. This grandparents' day is a major fund raiser for the school and is clearly successful. I saw many envelopes being filled with cheques that were left on the tables. I suppose that when an event is successful there is no reason to alter the program. The school has about 350 students. I need to stop trying to fix things that are not broken. Next year, I will just attend and enjoy. I promise. Molly loved it. That should be enough. Grandparents' Day was delightful. But somehow or another, I just can not stop trying to make it better. And I guess never will.

November 8, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. The Ultra Sound.

Before we left for Canada, the Urologist suggested to Ken that he have an ultra sound of his groin so the appointment was made. But the machine broke. The first appointment was in the university hospital but the second one was to be in the Pavilion, which is much easier for us. But we were not told the time or date. I suspect a letter arrived giving us the date but we missed it. On Tuesday afternoon I received a call alerting me of Ken's appointment on Thursday. I had forgotten all about it but Ken asked me this week is he still needed an ultra sound. My calendars both big and small showed nothing. So today we drove to the Pavilion for Ken to take the test. Kashina drives us. Fortunately she is a good driver. Everything went well. The appointment was at 10:15 so we wanted to leave at 9:30 but we were late leaving. Ken and I set the alarm for 8:00, giving us 90 minutes before walking out the door. Now we know we must allow two hours. The University radiology department if efficient. We arrived on time and we were in the car driving home at 11:00. We were pleased but await the result. While waiting for Ken to take his test, I listened to a conversation between three people. They were sitting on chairs to my left. I could not see them but I clearly heard every word. I had difficulty understanding their words, even though I knew they were speaking English. I also could not tell if they were black, white or hispanic. I asked Keshina if she could tell the difference just by listening their words. She admitted that some times she can and sometimes as she can not but she looked at the three. I had no clue what their racial origin was just by listening. Today I got fooled. In truth, there were two white people and one person of color having a conversation. That Mississippi accent is difficult for me. And I certainly can not tell who they are. The only other observation for me was that I saw several large people today in the Pavilion. Both height and width were impressive. It turned out to be an interesting time during the ultra sound.

November 7, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Decisions.

Decisions have been made. We are having Thanksgiving dinner at our house. Today I ordered our traditional feast from Primos. Linda , Christina's mother wanted to have it at her place again but we prevailed. For Ken eating at home is easier. If he gets weary, he can retreat to his chair in our TV room, which is not in the living room. Today I selected the food for our party on December 8th, which will be held again at the Yacht Club, just down the road. Christina will send the Save The Date today. I always have a birthday party for myself so we are doing it again. We invite our friends and their children to start the holiday season. For the first several years, we held the party in Mexican restaurants but last year we selected the yacht club, which proved to be a success. We will dine on pasta. Mexico is on our mind. The first decision is do we want to go. The next question is how can we get there. And the third question is how we could function when we are there. One decision has already been made. We have booked our condo for 6 weeks from December 22 to February 2. Ken thinks we should go. David and Suzanne and the girls are on the cusp of making the booking to come on Boxing Day. Wonderful Wendy may join us. Now the other decisions are still pending. The longer I am away from taking Ibrance the more energy I will have. But more decisions must be made. But we have made good progress today. More decisions must be made shortly. We are up to the task, I bet.

November 6, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. The shower.

Ken is perfectly capable of taking a shower by himself. This afternoon I took a nap. From the bathroom I could hear Kashina's voice. "Lift up your right arm," I could hear her say. Then,"now your left," "I forgot to wash your beard and mustache". "Now turn around so I can scrub your back." Kashina was helping Ken take a shower. It was very sweet. Evidently, when Ken told Kashina that he was going to take a shower, she offered to help so he said yes. When the shower was over, I could hear Ken say that that was the best shower he has had in months. Clearly, he liked the assistance. Kashina is our helper. She is a good one. She has a CNA certificate, which means, Certified Nursing Assistant and it shows. She expertly bandaged Ken's arm. And she can put drops in his eyes easily, which is difficult for me to do. In a short period of time, she has become indispensable to us. She helps Ken do his exercises and she walks with him for about 20 minutes each day. And she helps at home, doing the laundry and emptying the dishwasher and putting out the trash. But the most important part of her task is her kindness to Ken. She is dear to Ken, encouraging and light hearted. But listening to her instructions to Ken this afternoon took the cake. I suspect that Ken will take all his showers when she is working. He has always been a smart man.

November 5, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. My Eyes.

I was all set to have my vision improved by having new lens changed in my glasses. Just before we left for the summer, I had a procedure called needling to reduce the pressure in my right eye, which continued to be too high. It worked. My pressures were low, but my vision was poor. 20/60. Dr. O. thought that as the pressure increased just a bit, the vision would settle down. When I returned, I would be able to return to better vision. But it has not worked that way. In July, the pressure was 4, which is too low. Today it is 6, which is still too low. My vision continues to deteriorate. My vision in my right eye is 20/100. My left eye is fine except I have a small amount of vision in my left. I have big blotches where I can not see but what I can see I have 20/25. Close to perfect. So the procedure worked too well. Now the good doctor applied drops to add a bit if scar tissue to the right eye. She wants the pressure to increase a bit. In one month I see her again when perhaps my pressures will be perfect. Then I will be able to have new lens made for my right eye. Today I was all set to have my vision improved. I should have known better. Next time I will only expect to have another appointment and another procedure. The good thing is that I really like the lady doctor. She is a glaucoma specialist who has a cabin in the mountains of Idaho. She and her daughter spent two weeks in July hiking the mountains. We talk beautiful places as she examines me. Eventually she will send me back to Dr.K. But not yet. First she must get my pressures right. In the meantime, I hope my vision will improve in my right eye. I think it is kind of funny. For the past 18 years, I have been fighting to keep my pressures down. Now we have succeeded but now we must get them up a bit. I think the whole thing is amusing. At least my optic nerve is not getting damaged. I just keep hoping for the best. And continue to make appointments.

November 4, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Time.

Time has always been important to me. The first day of our trip down the Grand Canyon our guide urged us all to remove our watches. "We will be regulated by the sun, so you have no need to pay attention to the time of the day. We will get up with the sun, we will eat lunch when the sun is high and we will retire for the night when it is dark". Everyone did as they were told...except for me. I kept my watch on the whole time. I am more comfortable knowing the time and I would have been very uncomfortable removing my watch. If you ask me how I tell the time of the day, I would tell you that I use my wrist watch. But I would be wrong. Today we met Christina and the girls for brunch. We all arrived at the same time at 11:15. Near the end of the meal, Ken asked me for the time and I gave it to him. Kate corrected me and said that we turned the clocks back last night so my watch was wrong. Up until then, I had no clue that we should have moved the clocks back, so I was surprised. No one had mentioned it to me and I do not watch TV news. I was amazed that we arrived at the restaurant at the right time. Then I realized that I am using my cell phone to tell time. The first thing I do every morning is put on my watch but evidently I do not look at it. The whole morning, I was using the corrected time on my cell phone, which of course, is done automatically. Thank heavens for cell phones. I could have missed brunch.

November 3, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Hockey Night In Canada.

Even here in Mississippi, we get to watch "Hockey Night In Canada". We watch it on the NHL channel. Once upon a time, it was the only hockey you could see on TV. In fact, in the early years, only the last two periods were shown. When we lived in Toronto, we had no television so we watched the game at Don and Doreen's house. Now we watch lots of hockey on TV. We can watch every Nashville Predators games and most evening we could watch a game if we wish. But hockey Night In Canada has been one of the few constants in my life. This evening I had a clicker working overtime. The Toronto Maple Leafs were playing the Pittsburg Penguins in Pittsburg and the Leafs won 5 to 0. Payback. At the same time the Predators were playing. At the moment they are winning 1 to 0, which is not a winning score that is guaranteed. Then we get to watch a late game too. Almost too much hockey. Ken and I seldom go out at night so we have a date at home on Saturday night and watch Hockey Night In Canada. And we have fun.

November 2, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Evaluation.

Our cruise was lovely. We were looked after hand foot and finger. But Ken feels that he will not be able to take any more cruises. Even the calm waters of the Mississippi made the boat rock just a bit. Even docked, the boat had a roll. AnD Ken said that the ground under him sometimes moves already. Perhaps no cruises in our future. Getting around in New Orleans was impossible. We made an error in staying those four days. But now we know that we can not function in big cities. Mobility is an issue for both of us and vision is difficult for me. No big cities will be in our future either, at least when we are on our own. We travelled well on commercial airlines getting to Minnesota but we will not take two flights on the same day. One flight a day we can manage easily but two a day wears us out. So now we know. Traveling on the private jet was a dream come true. I wish I was rich. Our summer in Nova Scotia was excellent. Ken loved sitting looking at the ocean and he had no trouble with the stairs. Often he was up and down 4 or 5 times a day. The walking path at the arena worked well for both of us. Although it is boring, it is secure with the rail on one side and the wall on the other. Ken walked over 1 K each time. When we stayed home, Ken walked around our property. And being around friends was a treat for both of us. We hope we are able to spend another summer there. Our helper Katie was an added bonus. Now we must evacuate our future journeys. We are booked into our Mexican condo for 6 weeks. We must decide how we can get there and how we can function there. Soon we will talk. But not yet. We have just completed our evaluation of our ambitious summer of 2018. And we are pleased.

November 1, 2018. Madison, Mississippi. Dr. Collins.

Young Dr. Collins is moving to Florida. His wife's family live in Jacksonville. Everyone lives there so the family decided to raise their only child, who is three, along with their cousins, aunts and uncles and grandparents. Dr. Collins and his wife have no family in Jackson. We are sorry he is leaving. He is a good Urologist. And he is the only doctor we know who encourages us to keep up with our wandering ways. "Just keep going as long as possible," said the good doctor today. Ken was not in good condition the first time we saw Dr. Collins, which was at the end off March. Ken arrived in a wheelchair and using a catheter. Now Ken looks good and walks well using the walker. All his plumbing works. So Dr. Collins is pleased with Ken's progress. Now we will be turned over to another Urologist in the same practice, which will be fine. Dr. Collins is having a hard time saying goodbye to all his patients, some of which he has cared for since he completed his residency. He begins work in Florida January 2. We will miss his efficiency and his quiet manner. We never wait. Before we see Dr. Collins we have already seen the nurse followed by thew Resident Doctor who asks lots of questions. By the time we see Dr. C., he has revived the situation and he gives us his decisions. He looks like he is 16 except he has gray hair. But he knows his stuff and we like his style. And of course he thinks the same way as we do as to how to lead your life. We wish him well in Florida.