May 27, 2014. Ridgeland, Mississippi. Dinner.

We did it. The six of us ate dinner in the dining room. And it was very pleasant. Up until now, we have eaten dinner sitting around the coffee table. I think everyone was aware of the empty chair. Tonight, we were careful to mix up our seating. It was Molly who suggested we eat dinner in the dining room. I inwardly gulped but agreed that it was a good idea. We put Ken at the head of the table where Andrew usually sits and we put Christina and Molly on the side, right beside Ken. Kate sat at the other end of the table with Mary Frances and me on the side. So everyone was in a different chair than is the norm. There was only one anxious moment. Normally, Andrew asks the blessing before dinner but tonight, no one said a word when the blessing should have been said. No one at that table was prepared to say a word so we all just started eating. And the anxious moment passed. All six of us were aware of who was missing from the table but we all carried on our conversation and kept our grief private. I am told that the first time you do anything without your loved one is especially difficult. Tonight, we enjoyed our first meal sitting around the dining table without Andrew. And we all missed him, but we carried on.